


WONDERLAND

by abeyance



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: (but they dont know it), 90's Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Arranged Marriage, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Healing, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, On the Run, Past Abuse, Past Sexual Abuse, Past Sexual Assault, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Songfic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-03
Updated: 2020-03-08
Packaged: 2021-01-20 23:54:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 29,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21290264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abeyance/pseuds/abeyance
Summary: Daenerys has finally escaped the abusive clutches of her brother - and now a runaway bride of a sort, she's lost. But with the best bad luck ever, it just so happens the owner of the car she is trying to steal also wants to escape some family of his own. Through each other, the trust and love and hope they both had been once and always denied is rebuilt - except, its all on top of a secret that both of them know, but not enough to understand.previously named drapetomania.
Relationships: Daenerys Targaryen & Rhaella Targaryen, Jon Snow/Daenerys Targaryen
Comments: 154
Kudos: 231





	1. prelude part i

The door’s lock gave in with a satisfying click, earning Daenerys’s relief - despite her track record of picking locks exceeding success. This time was for a different cause, in a way. 

The driver’s seat was a nice, worn-leather cushion as she slid into it. She took a breath, gathering herself, and looked at what her ignition tactic would have to be.

It was then that she realized watching films that included cars could not fill her lack of experience with them; she could count how many times she was permitted to go a far enough distance to use one, much less learn to drive. All ignitions looked like they worked the same. A screwdriver could take the place of a key in any of them, right?

Wrong, Daenerys learned, as she attempted to start the Camaro. Maybe she was twisting it the wrong way? But there was too much resistance for the opposite way to actually be the right one. Daenerys tried to start the car again, soft palms tight against the plastic handle of the cheap screwdriver she shoplifted. Viserys would know if anything was misplaced.

Daenerys noted that. If he were to know a screwdriver he only has the Butlers touch had been moved, he would acknowledge his sister - more so, his _ investment _ \- being absent from the house she was not permitted to leave.

But that wasn’t a problem right now. It wouldn’t be a problem at all an hour after she got this stupid car started, dammit. Daenerys failed to start it one more time before defeating her head onto the steering wheel. 

She reminded herself that if she were to go the easy way, steal one of her brother’s cars, he would put the pieces together quicker. And then he would have every state ranger looking for his little sister who was ‘tasting a bit of rebellion’, as he would cover it, and find her cruising down in his shiny new Corvette. She would be back where she started by the morning. Only worse conditions, punishments, limitations. Guarantees she did not want.

And so her next step was stealing someone _ else’s _ car. Obviously.

Stolen vehicles happened enough that it would seem like bad luck. And she would have an untracked license plate, unlike her brother’s. If only she had a driving license to go with it - but again, that was a worry for _ after _ getting the car started. Which was not happening.

Daenerys rolled her head side to side on the steering wheel, smoothing her ache out of her forehead through the red beanie as her body started forming a cold sweat. It may just be this car. She would just have to try another one. But odds are that she already raised suspicion, and the second to last thing she needed was to have a trail of witnesses watch her break into her goldie-locks picks of cars in this random off-urban neighborhood. 

She pushed herself off the steering wheel and pushed her loose hair behind her ears. Daenerys wrapped her hand around the screwdriver’s handle and pulled, rebounding her arm against the seat as it left the ignition with the force of restricted weight. She inflicted her funny bone and let herself curse as the nerve trembled in her arm. 

A knock sounded next to her ear, at the window - and with a yelp of surprise, Daenerys jumped out of her skin, causing a small honk of the horn to squeak. She cringed at the horn - the alarm it must’ve caused the surrounding houses - and then turned to the previous interruption. 

And then it was brought to her that any alarm that was brought to the neighbors meant nothing. A man’s silhouette stood at her window, soft features highlighted from the street lights through the shadows of the other wise nightly hour.

The only reason she didn’t die of horror right there was because the man hadn’t smashed through the window and ripped her out of the car yet - something that would surely have already happened if this had anything to do with her being found by anyone associated with Viserys.

Daenerys turned her head quickly back forward, placing her eyes at the bottom of the steering wheel. She blindly rolled the window down, cool air flooding around her shoulders as the man gripped the roof and bent down to her level. She saw nothing but dark hair swinging into her peripheral as a strong scent of woodpine overtook her. She identified the small familiarity of it that set in the car before showed up; meaning this man was probably the owner of it. _ Great. _

“You know, you could’ve just asked for the keys,” his said. She blinked at the friendliness of it. But it automatically put her more at ease with actually looking at him, now; and she turned to find dark features on lightly tanned skin, the shadows not lying in their play of his softness in eyes and nose and cheekbones and, as it seems, his mind as a whole. Daenerys’s mouth parted, speech escaping through the gape with no words attached.

Her arms instinctively dropped to her lap as he reached over her to put the keys into the ignition. When he saw the car wouldn’t start then, he made a quick observation.

“It may also help if you press the brake down when you attempt to start it.”

Oh. She never knew that. Looking down at the gas and brake, she also didn’t know which one was which. 

The man looked at her when she made no move to press on the brake. He reached his outside arm down and did so himself, and the cars engine revved into life.

Daenerys’s heart stuttered as she felt the vibration of it beneath her. The feeling was unfamiliar, and this whole situation was...surreal.

He sat back onto his heels, once again being encompassed by darkness. Her eyes followed him before returning to the started car.

“Aren’t you going to take off? Hit reverse and step on it, zooming away as I run after you until the corner where I let you go in defeat?”

Daenerys looked over the lever in the middle, taking his vocabulary into consideration. _ Hit _ reverse? She didn’t see a button for it. Maybe the R labeled along the other letters had something to do with it, but the lever wouldn’t move when she pulled it.

She heard the man shift his footing against the pavement. She could feel him assess her. 

“You have _ no idea _ how to drive, do you?” he was back in the open window. Daenerys took this time looking at him to take in his curls that escaped from a half bun at the back of his head. She shook her head, the stun of this situation tensing the motion into slow speeds. 

She almost missed a tug of his lips that spelt disbelief himself. He opened the door. Daenerys flinched as he bent back over, the movement a little too similar to Viserys’s ‘playful’ attacks. He retreated a bit, easing his motions. 

“Move down,” he said, simply. After a moment of staring in a bit of disbelief, she complied. He climbed into the car. “I’m going for a drive to clear my head. Company would be nice, and I’m not up for anyone in my family taking that role right now.” 

Daenerys gazed at him with wide eyes. Was she going to get killed tonight? Is that how this happens? She couldn’t decide if she liked her relationship with the prospect of it. He met her focus on him.

“And then I’ll take you home. My name’s Jon. I’m not a murderer.”

Yes, because _ that _ felt reassuring. 

“That’s what a murderer would say,” Daenerys found herself saying. Her voice was soft, and her bluntness surprised her. She wasn’t great at interaction since she didn’t get much of it. “And the name that they would pick.” 

He looked back at her - his face held as much shock at the sound of her voice as she felt. But then that small smile tugged again. “Alright, then. I won’t take you home, but back to my basement to murder you. And my name is definitely spelt J-O-H-N like any fake name would be spelt, and not J-O-N.”

Despite slight repulsion, Daenerys found herself biting the inside of her cheek to hide a smile. She faced forward as the interior lights dimmed. There was one more moment that the man - Jon - remained focusing on her before putting the car in reverse and peeling onto the streets.

* * *

The ride was quiet. Of course it would be - what would complete strangers have to talk about? Ignoring the one obvious topic- why she was attempting to steal his car - but that was something she was not going to bring up herself.

It didn’t take long, but still longer than she thought, for him to bring it up. 

“So, is breaking into cars to try and figure out how to turn them on a weird hobby, or something?”

“Is driving said-Failed-Car-Stealer home after you catch them a hospitality rule i never heard of?”

“Probably not,” he admitted, “But I’d assume the returning favor wouldn’t be snarky comments based on my decision that ended in your benefit. I can easily take a left and we’ll be at the police station before you can come up with an excuse.”

That quieted Daenerys up. She didn’t know where this personality was coming from - whether it be her tone or actually going forth with...leaving. 

The next stretch of time after she shut back down became tense. It was odd _ how _ tense it became; it was what she imagined a couple’s fight would be followed with. The thought of it, along with Jon’s growing-to-be-even-more-flattering-each-time-she-looked-at-him’s features...it set an odd spark in her abdominal. 

But she found Jon to be looking at her more than the latter. If the circumstance was different, she perhaps would tell him to keep his eyes on the road. But Daenerys knew nothing about cars or driving, anyway, and she didn’t want him to have another reason to be annoyed at her. Jon has only offered her things, and still, Daenerys felt like she’d asked for too much. What little more would a crash be?

He cleared his throat. “I didn’t mean to be so rude.” 

Even though she was more surprised at him giving her a half apology for no reason, she seemed to fold smaller into herself. Why on earth did this man need to act this way? This kind?

“I’m not going to turn you in, Love.” she snapped her head up at the nickname. Although it was common enough in casual terms, her mind became white. “But I would like to know your name.”

Those two ideas fit themselves together amongst the blankness of Daenerys’s mind. That, and everything else…. -

God, she was so stupid. _ So _ stupid. Impulsive and ignorant and stupid and _ terrified _. 

She attempted to break into a vehicle to steal it. She got caught. The owner of the car is aimlessly driving around, asking for personal information and speaking of contacting the police. Oh god, the _ police _ . It would be bad enough that Viserys caught her outside, but in a police station? For _ trying to steal a car? _ Her plan and any future plans of leaving would be ruined. Her life would be even more over than it already was.

She remained silent for the time Jon gave her to answer. He sighed, landing a hand heavily on the wheel in dwindling patience. She didn’t blame him. But Daenerys has already done enough damage to…well, everything. Any worse and she probably would find herself in trouble.

“Fine, then. Home it is.” he waited for her address, or directions. Daenerys had no idea how to get home; and she never exactly looked at her house number. She recalled the street name she walked under during her escape walk, though, and told him quietly. 

There were a few turns, accompanied with nothing but the ticking of the blinker and Daenerys’s congested breaths in the seasonal air. Her eyes remained focused on her wringing hands as she reasterted her paranoia; Viserys was drunk when she left. His friends were over again, so he locked her bedroom door. He had no idea that she was gone, much less even out of her own room. Her obedience to his rules had given Daenerys just enough trust with him that she would never act out. Just enough that even leaving tonight was a possibility. She knew she would be able to get this far next time. Now all she needed to do was prepare better. Right? It was the recurring question after every assumption.

Some time along the ride, she figured out how to roll the window just enough for some fresh air. As Jon slowed his car down at a four-way, sounds of a party came from Daenerys’s left. Jon turned to her.

“Left or right?”

She looked at the street sign, realizing it was her street they approached. The strained sounds of a party was her brother’s. Nausea rose up her burning throat at the thought of it; At her true failure, at the image of going back. She swallowed it down hard, the gulp pushing a button that broke her scalp and arms and hips into a state of hot sweats, despite the cool air chilling her nose and cheeks. Jon’s seat creaked as he leaned back in it, taking her sudden state into a sympathetic state. He curved his back, hesitantly touching her arm as he leaned over the console. It made Daenerys jump, snapping her head to him. The sudden movement caused a loosening tear fall from her eye, one that she didn’t know had formed.

“I, uh…” Jon searched her face as Daenerys focused on his dark eyes. Somehow, they reminded her to breathe. Jon took note of the discomfort his touch brought her and retreated it onto the center console. “I’m not ready to go back home, either. How about you tell me your name, and we can maybe drive around for a little bit. Vent if we need to.”

Daenerys understood his offer. Tell him her name, this little bit about herself, and they keep driving. Away from all of this. At least for a little while. But if she couldn’t trust him with that, even after all that he just did for her, it would be an empty deal. Nothing but two strangers in their own unfortunate paths, lines intersecting for a brief moment in the world’s strange timeline. A fleck amongst the stars, or a star of its own.

She knew nothing about this man, but she trusted him to do that for her. Make this fleck into a star. 

“Dany,” she told him. Her full name would uncover too much of her life. This moment was one not many were able to come by; being able to decide exactly how a person will know you as. And although all of her secrets were right down the streets, she had the chance to hide them right here as she rolled up the window, closing the sounds of that life to the outside. Pretend they didn’t exist. And so to Jon, Daenerys Targaryen was just Dany. “My name is Dany.”

He gave into his smile’s tug this time, keeping his eyes on her as he pushed back into his seat and passed across her street. Dany set her eyes to the glow of her family’s mansion against the other houses who have shut their lights off for the night. It took three more blocks for the sight of it to completely disappear behind her.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daenerys is given some news that makes her want to do something stronger than ever before. Jon continued their drive, stopping at a hotel for the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you to everyone who showed their love last chapter!

“Daenerys!” 

She winced, looking towards her closed door as her brother’s voice slipped through the cracks underneath it. Daenerys stayed silent, deciding not to waste her energy responding to Viserys when he would just continue anyway. He proved that very point as the doorknob turned and he pushed into her room. “We have a party to plan!”

It wasn't an event that only happened on occasion, these parties, but something in his voice told her he had an excuse for this one. “Come out of this room, down to the kitchen. You will be so glad, Daenerys.”

For a moment, Daenerys let herself feel the spark of excitement in her chest. His eyes were filled with a childish glee she did not see unless it meant he was very excited about a movie he wanted to see or something. But whatever could make both she and him happy?

Viserys disappeared quicker than he came, and Daenerys hesitantly followed him, soft feet sliding into her slippers to preamble them for the kitchen’s cold tile. She closed the door behind her; although her bedroom was sparse of possessions, she never liked the idea of her brother's Butlers and Maids looking inside. It was the one place in this whole manse that she could validly pretend that it belonged solely to her.

She scanned the walls for any new decorations on her descent downstairs. Viserys had a habit of finding the newest things, no matter how ugly, to fill the walls and empty rooms. There was too much space for just the two of them, alone now, so Daenerys didn't exactly mind. She just made sure to hide a portion of her own inheritance somewhere between her few books.

Her brother was pacing the length of the dining table when she arrived. Daenerys sat at her designated spot. He did the same, but let some excitement bounce him a little more into it. Daenerys's heart tore between excitement and distrust.

She sat further in her chair as her brother leaned forward, placing his hands on the surface. “We're finally going to be free, Daenerys.”

Dread set in her stomach. Those words were tossed around this house too much for what they meant.

“There is a family that lives not far from here. Our ancestors feuded, but their company is about to  _ skyrocket _ , little sister.”

She knew what was coming, and yet, she tried to believe a whole different timeline. A different life.

“And with a simple marriage between you and one of their sons, we will be there when it happens!”

A timeline where arranged marriages were seen as awful to him as it does to mostly everyone else. Like the maids that always gifted her with looks of pity. 

This had happened before. Her brother found the lowest, most wretched option as any, calling her to the kitchen to announce her marriage to Khal Drogo. His family came from the leading line of an ancient tribe. He had a fortune stored in the historical heirlooms and weaponry techniques he practiced. Before Viserys was able to conjoin their finances, exploit it, like his plan, Drogo caught on and promptly left. She had no idea how they annulled the marriage, but she hasn't seen him since, and was glad of It.

“You seem much more excited this time, brother.” Dany was glad he didn’t seem to see the distaste in her mocking statement. He was probably too blind in his success of finding another investment.

He didn't hold a party the last time. His account had been frozen and they were two weeks from being evicted from their family home. If it wasn't for Dany's hidden funds they would have been gone before that.

“Well, we aren’t going to be living with blatant Savages, little sister. This family is civilized. They follow the same gods that we do.” 

Dany personally did not follow any gods. She had learned not to trust many individuals, and those who rule upon such large quantities of minds and lives definitely should not be an exception in her own. The Dothraki  _ were _ civilized, to a point. They just had to catch up with the...modern wifely duties. Dany certainly knew that, and would remember it for a long time. 

Maybe this marriage would be different enough to put it behind her. But she also knew that she had less choice than most people would, though. This  _ son _ she was to be married off to was probably as much a part of the decision as her brother was. Viserys said that they lived close, too - the Targaryens, even after Viserys’s luxury expenses - were known to be the richest in the zip code. If she were to marry someone in any close relativity, she would consequently be marrying down. Her future husband must have been  _ jumping _ at the offer. 

“And what is their company?” all of her questions were lined up in her mind - but there still weren't many. As much as Daenerys wanting to be as prepared as possible, she believed her brother was so adamant on his plan with Drogo because of the interest she seemed to hold. 

“ _ Great _ inquiry, Little Sister.” The more his eyes glowed, the more attention she held to anything but them. “ _ Authentic. Wolf wear. _ ”

“Wolf wear?” she also gasped at her unfiltered response. But Viserys seemed too excited to care about her under-toned disbelief.

“Yes! Real wolf fur, made into all of these fine jackets and purses and rugs. We will never be cold again, sweet sister.”

She wanted to ask where exactly the fur was  _ coming from _ , not being able to bring herself to believe there was enough legal hunting ground to compensate for a new - or rebranding - company. But that would make Viserys feel that she was doubting him, and that was something that couldn’t happen unless she wanted  _ the _ lecture about how it was his job to restore their family legacy, and he knew what was best to do just that. In other words, Viserys did not like criticism.

He went on about it. Failing to mention to family’s name, or even her soon-to-be-husbands  _ first _ name; instead, he expressed the benefits of their company, mainly being circuitous about how they would be warm for the winter, as if they did not have internal heating throughout the house.

Although he may have called her down to tell her about her own...engagement, of a sorts, it wasn’t hard zone anything out without missing anything. That came into her favor; because all her mind had become was a cloud of nightmares that were somehow her realities the last time this had been announced. 

She stood with him, following him aimlessly and wired as Viserys made multiple arrangements.

Upon his routes she took the slim opportunity of his egotistical distractions to sneak back upstairs into her own room. It may not have a lock, but it had a door, atleast. 

It gave her a placebo effect of safety to think dangerous thoughts that were threatening to leak out of her ears.

The thought that had always been repeating itself, starting some years ago, on an automatic wheel in her brain’s deepest, darkest corners and cracks.

_ Run. You want to run. You just escaped from him once, you can do it again. Find a reason and a way and run. _

* * *

Dany kept her head against the window, cushioned by her red cap as she watched the lights of the world around her pass. It was one of the last things she pulled over her head before committing to her leave; covering her roots where her natural silver hair grew. Her features wouldn’t draw too much attention, but she gathered it would pull a little bit off of herself - at least if Viserys or any of his friends  _ did _ happen to glance outside at the wrong moment. 

She tipped her head just enough to look at Jon without catching his eye. They’ve stayed silent throughout the aimless ride - but the space between them rang loud with thoughts. If this was what the world was like...strangers, enjoying eachother's company… no wonder why Viserys did not like the idea of her being in it. She would fall in love with the comparison way too fast for him to manipulate the evil.

Jon’s brows were hard in concentration. She could almost feel the ache it would form on herself. Dany bit her lip in light sympathy, wondering would could ever bring someone to such deep thoughts. Especially the way he seemed so at ease with the person who just tried stealing his car to be right in the passenger seat - The weight of his problems must be heavily bearing if it was a feeling anywhere near natural. Unless car theft was even more common than Dany thought.

It must have been an hour, but Jon drove.

All though she probably should have felt it - she never exactly stayed up late - Daenerys's mind lacked any sort of need for sleep. How could she do anything  _ but  _ stay awake? So what are you doing thoughts ran on in an awful repeat in replace of it. All of them along the fact of what the Stars was happening.

What was going to happen next? There was a very small window she had to return undetected but frankly, every time her mind leaned towards the thought of it, Dany had to put a hand to her stomach and gulp her nausea down. But that would have to stop eventually. What was she to do when Jon got tired and returned her to her home?

Dany drifted her thoughts to Jon’s. She had never been so interested in what a random person was thinking. She faced ahead, watching the car pass under a highway overhead sign.

“Where exactly are we going?”

Jon snapped out of his mind, slightly startled at her prompting a conversation after such an array of silence. His forehead relaxed and he glanced at her before turning back to the road.

“Just driving,” he shrugged, “Not to a ditch for me to bury you alive in, don't worry.” He flashed her a strange smirk. Although she was wide awake, Dany could tell Jon was lowering in his energy.

“Where to, then?” She attempted to make the conversation lighthearted; for the sake of how kind he has been, if not anything else. But no matter how much she tried, the disorientation still underlined the tone.

He seemed to not mind, nonetheless. Either that or he was just too tired to.

“Nowhere specific,” Jon admitted. “ But I was going to maybe stop at a motel or something for the night.”

Dany's brows pinched, the fabric of her beanie scratching across her ears. “We're not going back?”

He shrugged his hand on the wheel, tapping it once. “We are a good two or three hours out anyway. And as I said before, I really don't want to be around my family right now.”

He took a moment. She watched his eyes shift earnestly, searching his psyche before her eyes.

“I'll pay for a separate room for you, if that's what you're worried about.” 

She snapped her head to him, eyes wide and confused at his offer. Jon held his gaze on her a bit longer than before, only looking at the road for half a second at a time to do it. His eyes started to fill with something sad.

“And... if you need it, some nights after that, too.”

Dany stared at him then, speechless. He took the time to do the same, long enough to watch her lips part in disbelief before setting his focus directly back to the road.

Now the silence  _ was _ tense. An awkward tense.

“Why?” She asked. The question held so much in it's small syllable of a word. Why was he  _ so _ okay with her stealing his car? Why not turn her in? Why pay for her shelter for however long she felt it for?  _ Why was he so nice? _

She was surely about to be killed.

Dany watched his hand tap to a personal beat against the wheel. She supposed he was thinking of an answer. Or her question as a whole.

“I don't know exactly what you are running from,” he swallowed. There was a red light, so he slowed down, taking the chance to pause and actually look at her. “But I can see you need help doing it. And for someone who knows how it can feel, who has the resources to help you do just that, and to deprive you of it? What kind of man would I be?” 

She took a long moment to process his words. Dany licked her lips only as the light returned to green, preparing for her answer, as he continued onto the road ahead. She held off for just the amount of time to maybe make him feel like he answered her enough into silence - but contradictingly, she once again was simply brought to no words but his in her head. Was she that much of an open book? His own struggles...she did not know what they were, and if he hadn’t mentioned he had them, she would never guess he was in her same situation. Maybe. Of a sorts. No one could really be in the  _ same _ situation as her, she reminded herself - being married off for familial gain on the borderline of the twentieth and twenty-first century.

Dany reminded herself the his trust in his own assumption was ridiculous. She lifted her chin, and countercharged;

“And what if I'm just a teenager, running away from her chores? Sneaking out for the night?”

He shook his head. “You're not.” 

When Dany prepared her question, she based a lot of it off of what she knew - or  _ assumed, _ as it seemed - he would answer it with. But something in his voice told her he knew he was right.

She lingered for a second, and then placed her focus straight ahead. 

It drifted as he drove on. Dany's arse started to ache, and so did her bent knees, sometime into the long strip of highway. She'd never seen this far from her house. She had nothing that held any familiarity around her. And no matter how much terror tried to creep into her brain the prospect of it, she was only terrorized by the sense of calmness that overtook her instead.

Dany readjusted to sit more on her tailbone, glancing to Jon. He showed no discomfort. And honesty, the stone state of his face unsettled her. 

They had been on the highway for a while, surrounded by nothing but trees on either side. So it surprised Dany when they neared the glow of stores and outlets ahead of them. She tucked her arms within the ball she had rolled her legs into and admired them all.

The car’s slight rev under her turned to something normal. Slowly, despite her mind being awake, her eyelids got heavier as they caught each passing location. Dany screamed at them; out of anything she decide on doing that night...leaving her house, stealing a car, agreeing to drive with a stranger - her worst would be falling asleep. That was putting a trust in this man that was barely reasonable, whether he insisted he wasn’t going to kill her or not.

Her eyes tried to ignore her pleas. There were enough stupid decisions for one day. She wanted to live long enough to see where they may take her, if it wasn’t death.

* * *

Gentle fingertips shook her out of her onset of drowsiness.

The darkness of the night had no true say on how long Dany had been staring into her lap; it was a state that her body adapted to during the long nights of her brother’s paranoia. He would have her sleep in his sights during the days before her marriage to Drogo; and not in fear that she would run, but rather the anxiety that she would somehow mess up the perfection that he promised Khal.

She never saw herself as perfect; it would be selfish to do so, anyway. But it was also hard to believe it with Viserys’s constant small adjustments...as well as the thought that she could become  _ un-perfect _ in a span of a week. If someone was truly perfect, wouldn’t it take more than diverting from living on the same schedule every day?

The nights would be full of him doing some sort of paperwork that he never explained to her, as Daenerys would sit on the couch a bit beyond his desk in front of him. He did not let her go to sleep until a certain time and wake up just the same. He did not want her getting too little, nor too much sleep. Their personal doctor prescribed the amount of hours for her body that it would need. It was then that Viserys commented on her petiteness, but it was okay because he thought Drogo probably preferred a smaller figure.

Having said smaller figure helped her, though; it was easier to shrink, implementing the simplicity of disappearing in a room when she did not want to be seen. Even though she was all light features, the spaces without light welcomed her.

As Dany looked around the now-parked car, she was quickly realizing it was harder to find that friendship out here. The world was encompassed with light; all of the dark corners were lit, even in the late state of night.

Dany tipped her head up, realizing they were at the mentioned hotel that Jon told her they would stop at. She followed his hand where it retracted back into him from her shoulder. He was watching her blink out of her tiredness.

“You alright?” Jon asked, his eyebrows going into the furrowed position that Dany started to see as a common state. She did jump a little when he gestured to her; usually being pulled to attention never meant anything particularly good, nor something should could ease into. He waited for her nod, which was a little stunned because of the previous absence of the question “ _ Are you okay? _ ” making an appearance in her life - then reached for his glove compartment where he pulled some money out. “Okay, c’mon.”

She watched him open the door on his side and did the same; looking back behind her in case she forgot anything. But the only things she brought were in her pockets. Viserys regulated her clothing, and again, would know if something was misplaced. She didn’t own any bags that she would be able to use, anyway; she never had a use for them, so she was never given one.

Jon paused when he got to the sidewalk he parked at, turning to make sure she followed with his hands stuffed in the pockets of a black denim jacket. Dany only glanced at him enough to know he was doing it before casting her eyes at her feet taking steps across the pavement.

There was a familiar smell of new furniture as she walked into the door jon held open for her. It reminded her of the constant remodels that took place around the manse.

Dany paused her steps as she neared the middle of the room, taking in the front desk and lobby. She looked over her shoulder, precariously waiting for Jon to continue on to what they need to do next. He caught her eyes as he passed her, and Dany trailed behind his shoulder as he yielded at the check-in.

“We would like two rooms for the night, please,” Jon stated to the girl, bracing his hands on the desk before him. The girl, no older than Dany, looked up from her magazine. She gave both Jon and Dany a one-up that made Dany hide her face behind his shoulder.

“At this time?” She seemed annoyed, Dany thought. As if they were not supposed to interrupt her during this shift.

Dany looked through her lashes. He nodded at the girl, checking over his shoulder to find Dany - perhaps check on her, since this was the first time he had seen her outside of his car. She watched him work a car; she wouldn't be surprised if he may be thought she was going to make her escape attempt from him now. But he simply turned back to the girl. Between the girl and the general situation, she never wanted a darker corner to shrink herself into so badly.

“Not just a double?”

“No, two singles. Conjoined, if it's possible.” There were sounds of clutter and paper rustling as Dany found a particularly loose string within Jon’s dark denim.

“Sign here and here. Fee is at the bottom.”

Dany felt a touch of shame as she remembered the way he agreed to pay for her...well,  _ offered _ . She had spoken barely enough words to him to fit in a finger count, and yet she owed him more than she could explain. And frankly, what she could probably afford. 

Dany stuffed her hands into her pockets, the cool metals she had stuffed in there pressing into her fingers. It was a comfort.

There was a jingle of keys and murmur of the two room numbers. Jon pivoted to face her, and then nodded his head to the hallways.

Dany obliged, walking a bit behind Jon until he paused at a set of two doors. He faced her, holding a key midway. She paused on it before pinching it between her thumb and index.

Jon eyes watched her; she could feel it. And so she met with his, each others faces clearly light in the hotel lighting.

“This is your room, and this is mine. There's doors inside that connect our rooms; I'll show you when we get inside.”

Dany nodded and averted their eye contact. Jon chuckled, throwing her off of what tone the conversation currently held.

“And if you need help with unlocking the door, just ask.” She knew his joke was just that, but she could joke too. Dany took the pin from the back of her beanie, the one that she used to unlock his car, brushing pass Jon to the lock. After some fumbling, Dany heard the tumblers echo just right. She twisted the doorknob open, stepped into the hotel room, and tilted her head over her shoulder.

“I was already in your car when you found me, remember.” Somehow it felt safe to banter. It felt fun, too, and there wasn't that fury that she could accidentally set off if she were to say such mocking things at home.

Jon could easily have that same fury underneath, too, Dany acknowledged. But that thought left itself as she found his face soft with amusement.

“Touche,” Jon admitted. He disappeared for a second, the sound of his own door unlocking softly in the hallway. A knock came from somewhere in her room. Dnny search for it, noting the sound and logic put together that the other door, across from her bed, was where it came from. She opened it, finding Jon on the other side. 

“We both have our own doors. Just knock on mine if you need anything.”

“Thank you,” Dany found herself being able to say. It seemed that her words had been leaving themselves on hold; but it also seemed that they returned now, where she felt...safe. Dany couldn't decide if it was because of her increasing belief that Jon was  _ not  _ going to kill her, his faith that she wasn't going to kill  _ him, _ or the small relief that she was going to be sleeping in a room that actually had a lock on the door.

She gifted him a small, grateful smile as she hugged the door closed. 

Her back pressed against the door as she looked around her room. Warm colors, but no starkness of any particular one. She made her way to the shower, not wanting to even think of setting her road-grimed finger atop the bed that looked very inviting to her increasingly tired soul.

The warmness of the water gave her comfort, somehow. She earned it to yet another locked door. Privacy as a whole; the kind that wasn’t lonely, but needed. The warmth of the water was enough of a friend.

The towels looked to have a unique freshness, and Dany wrapped her wet hair in one, glad to be able to use as many as she pleased.

Her form was blurred within the fog that covered the mirror when she went to look while leaving the shower. She felt an obligation, or something of the sort, to do so. To look at the girl who finally had enough guts to just...leave. She finally met with the trigger that had perfectly viable reasons. Not to say there weren’t plenty of equally valid reasons before, but there weren't many viable options to escape with. Dany would remind herself that countless nights, in the hours after Drogo would grow sick of her. And somehow, with however many miles between her and that life, she still started repeating the reasons why she didn’t sooner so she would not fall into guilt. The impossibilities that she would have to work with, or somehow push her way around.

Dany covered herself quickly, abandoning her thoughts, eyes trained on the door as previously instincts came forth. She squeezed her hair's moisture into the towel as the predicament of brushing it slowly coming into her mind as she came nearer to that part of her routine. She searched the drawers and counter, coming up with nothing. Her fingers combed through it before it dried too much into its natural knots when not brushed.

Somehow, her first layer of clothes did not feel that unclean, and so Dany decided she was to sleep in them. Simple leggings and a soft undershirt; not too far to what she wore before and after her time in marriage with Drogo. Her hair was plaited as she sat in the side chair by the window.

The sky has a slight blue hue to it, telling the world that dawn was approaching. With it, Dany could not help but think the events that would come with it. Or did the already happen?

Usually, Viserys would get... _ too _ excited, too self righteous, when he was with friends. That, along with the big break he made, Dany doubted he checked in on her on the way to bed - truthfully, she doubted he made it to his personal quarters at all. Even though the marriage didn’t end well, nor did it generally stay in tact - Drogo brought a lot of things into Viserys’s possession that he gained pride in inheriting. No matter what marriage she was going into now...even if it was for  _ wolf pelts, _ his high was already returning. It was something that blinded him; for a family that had most of their victories, their legacy, taken from them, his brain had been hotwired to believe any half success was bigger than the last full one.

But it was equally as likely that he was already on a rampage. Sending any authority out to search for his sweet bride of a sister. She could not decide whether or not a maid or butler would tell him if they found her absence before he woke up. She could not decide if not truly knowing unsettled her.

Dany felt peaceful, though. Despite her brother might as well killing his way to find his investment, she was looking down upon the world in a room with a lock. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter's words were almost twice the amount of last chapter - usually, i try to aim for a certain word count, but my vibes with this story are flowing so much that each chapter will just be however long until it feels right too end it. we'll see how that goes, haha!
> 
> the more i write, the more i have ideas. im very excited to continue with this story! see you next time, and if you wanna talk, find me at my tumblr, clarkesalive :)


	3. disc ii, track iii

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daenerys wonders why her brother has become distant. Jon and Dany have breakfast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you all so much for all of your love so far. i hope you enjoy the chapter!

There was a soft tap on her door. 

“Dany? Are you asleep, my love?”

Dany peeled her blankets off of her, going to the door and unlocking it. It cracked open, her mama’s identical silver hair sweeping through. Dany shook her head.

She was met was a kind, sympathetic smile. Her mama knocked again, scrunching her nose in that silly way, and Dany let her in, smiling.

Thy shut the door behind them. It closed out the noise from the party downstairs. 

“I don’t see how you could be. What princess can go to bed with her hair all of these sorts?!” Dany giggled, scurrying to her dresser for her brush before hopping next to Mama on her bed.

“Can you do three braids tonight, Mama?” Mama made a content hum at the suggestion.

“How about four, and then plait those together?” Dany’s eyes brightened in curiosity and excitement, flipping quickly as she held the brush over her shoulder.

Mother gathered all of her daughter’s loose hair, re-parting her scalp and prompting to start her combing.

“Why couldn’t Vissy play with me tonight, Mama?” Dany grabbed her Dragonelle stuffie, hugging it to her chest in re-determined disappointment.

“Your brother is getting older, sweetling. He would rather spend time with Papa’s friends.”

“But Papa’s friends are so _ loud _.”

The brush paused ever so slightly, but continued down undisturbed.

“It’s just how men can be, I’m afraid. But I'm sure he can play with you tomorrow, when Papa is working.”

“After our lessons, you mean.”

“_ Yes, _after your lessons. Remember what I told you Dany -”

“Lessons come before play. Yes, I remember. I don't mind lessons, not really. Especially reading.” her mother chuckled.

“Don't I know it.”

“But Vissy is _ always _ studying longer than me. He never has time to play.”

“Well, remember what I said - he is getting older. And he will be taking over the family’s company in a few years, too. He needs to study extra hard.”

Dany gave a dramatic sigh, pulling the plushy away to look at its face. 

“It’s always good for him to be with Papa’s friends for that reason, my Dany. He is learning what men want.”

“I suppose.”

“You _ suppose _, hm?” Dany nodded. Her mama tied the end of her hair. “What do suppose of your hair dress, then, princess?”

Dany jumped up at the announcement, skipping over to her vanity mirror. Her hand covered her audible gasp. “It’s beautiful! Oh, how I wish it wasn’t too late for a tea party.”

Mama came up behind her, giving the braid a final run through. “But it is, sweetling. Come on, into bed. We don’t want to fall into our books tomorrow.”

“Will you read?” Dany asked, hopping into bed. Mama straightened the covers, dimming her bedside lamp.

“Of course.” She curled around her daughter, opening the pages, and began to read the small one to sleep. Even as the party quieted on the other side, and her daughter fell into her precious 8 year-old snores, Mama continued to read until she herself fell asleep. Her last thoughts were a wish; one that she hoped would be granted far away from this place, and before her children were changed before her very eyes.

* * *

Dany woke up some time after dozing off. The sky was brighter than the time she last looked; which was the second before she gave into a blink that turned into sleep. It was something her running thoughts were avoiding.

She arched her neck, stretching the crinks that had formed, and turned to the window. Dawn was making its appearance on the horizon. Although the rest she got seemed somehow artificial, the thought of going back to sleep was something that was simply not in the cards.

The bed had a throw blanket placed along the end; she took it and wrapped her shoulders in it. Although comfortable, the shirt she wore did not pair with the onset of winter upholding. 

As she was seated back in the chair, Dany's focus strayed to the door adjacent to her bed. It could not have been more than a mere few hours since she had close the door to Jon, after saying a thank you to him. In the moment, he probably only took the gratitude at the face value of its worth - him telling her to let him know if she needed anything, and Dany understanding and appreciating his efforts. But within it, Dany really meant _ Thank you _. Thank you for some how being the forgiving, too-kind-of-a-stranger-to-give-her-an-accurate-first-impression-of-how-a-crime-victim-would-act man she was actually allowing herself to believe he truly was.

It was a Dangerous game, trusting Jon. But she has less than anything to lose. Worst case scenario, he would have turned her in. Which would have already happened by this point, Dany let herself admit it, anyway. 

Her eyes drifted to the window. She wondered if the air smelled any different at this time of day, in this place. If the wind set differently in someone's hair, if it would sweep a dress just as different. And if it did so here, how would it change if she went even further? To the sea, perhaps. And instead of dawn, dusk.

Dany took a deep breath - The first one she caught herself doing since she at least left her house.

It would be nice. She always imagined going to the beach; from what she understood, you could see nothing but see when you look out to it. The idea of that felt throwing; it was probably the closest feeling to looking out to the edge of the world.

If she were ever to experience it, she would want to experience at all. She would want to wear a dress to see if this wind would sweep its skirt differently, have her hair free to feel the wind move through it.

As she would think further, she realized how trapped that might seem. The end to something she never thought there was an end to. There was also a reminder that all things come to no end, no matter how big. That brought some hope. 

And that hope was well-served, Dany knew. As of right now, at least. But if that came true, that meant _ this _ would, too, come to an end. It might have already started. Prime morning was approaching, and with it, her brother waking to find his sister gone. If it hadn’t happened yet, it wouldn't be a few hours until it did.

The thought made her heart flutter in a way she did not like. Dany jumped to her feet, a weight on her lungs calling for any distraction off of it.

Her feet traveled to the door, and without thinking further than needing to just... _ move, do _something, she knocked on it lightly.

Dany adjusted her shoulders’ blankets in the few seconds before Jon opened the door. As her eyes flicked up to meet his face, his rumpled tired they gave her a bit of a step back. a reminder that he was human, it seemed. As if she needed confirmation but he wasn't an angel before.

She followed his eyes to her blanket.

“What's wrong? Are you cold?

Dany forgot to answer at first. But then she shook her head. Jon waited for her to say something, quietly clearing his throat as he waited.

Fact is, Dany did not have any reason to knock. She didn't need help with anything. She just...needed something to do.

“Well, breakfast is out in a half hour. Do whatever you need to and meet me in the hallway.”

Dany nodded, staying in an empty thought. Jon gave her one nod before clicking the door shut.

She didn't need to do much to get ready - part of that reasoning was that she didn't have anything to get ready with. But still, Dany washed her face and armpits, unbraided her hair, and delinted her beanie before putting it back on her head. The warmth was different then what the blankets brought; familiarity among all of these changes.

At twenty five after, Dany heard Jon’s door click. She waited a minute, folding the throw blanket and returning her arms into long sleeves before joining him.

Jon gave her a small smile as she closed the door, turning to the way they came the night before. As if she forgot, the whole ordeal last night resurfaced. Dany gave him a small smile, too.

At that, his face fell a bit. She turned to the side before seeing anything further.

Her hands suspended from her pockets as Jon and her made their way to the lobby. The light cotton sweat jacket was not her most exterior layer when she bundled up to leave, and the absence of her heirlooms she stored in those other pockets was even colder than the bite their metal gave her palms when she would clench them. They were especially missed as the lobby group nearer; and with that, voices.

A lot of them.

When her brother had parties, Daenerys never found herself actually partaking in them. Especially after her marriage with the Khal fell through. Viserys was very adamant about who had the honor of seeing his sister. At first, Daenerys thought that it was out of respect for her. Keeping all of the weirdos away from lusting after her. It was one of her first lies to herself that she was able to reconcile with. It was usually the friends that looked to have the most expensive faces, and clothes, and attitudes. That realization legendary to the next one; it wasn't for safety, but rather, her turning into a prize that only the worthy could win. the secretivity kept them interested to still play in the game. The lock on the outside of her door kept their darkest fantasies fresh. The milestone of meeting her kept their hope alive, They're competitiveness awake, and the want to see her again increasing in dangerous amounts.

Thus, she never had much experience with crowds. Especially when his friends may as well be tagging along in a search party for her.

Her hands tightened, looking for the anchor of the metals pressing in her palms. But all she found was sharp pain as her nails dug in instead.

They rounded a corner, and suddenly Dany couldn't help it. She ripped her hand out of her pocket and grasped onto Jon's forearm.

Understandably, Jon looked down to her, startled. Dany didn't meet his eyes like she always found it to be polite to do. Her own were training at the heavy groups of people - families, businessmen, couples - they all blurred into one giant mess of bodies. There was nowhere to move, nowhere to breathe -

His hand covered her own. Her gaze snapped to Jon’s, who had faced her. As he searched her face, his feet shifted until the scene was blocked to her by his body.

“Do you know what room you're in?”

Her mouth only responded in small pants, drying her parted lips.

Jon removed his hand from hers and reached into his pocket. Something jangled. He turned her hand over and palmed something into it - for a moment, everything relaxed. The keys felt so familiar to her comforts. But she looked down to them, diminishing that fantasy.

“Twenty one.” Jon tilted his head, pointing to the number on the key. “You head back upstairs, and I’ll get us a bit of everything, yeah?”

Dany kept her eyes down. She felt a bit embarrassed, if anything. Gaze set to the floor, she pivoted and shuffled back down the hallway as her heartbeat returned to something human.

She was sitting criss-crossed on her room’s bed, rubbing the fleece of the blanket back and forth that she had reset around her shoulders. A knock came from her door, and Dany answered it - Jon held a tray with an assortment of food placed on it as he promised. Dany opened the door wider to let him in. The scent of the food trailed behind him along with his faint woodpine aura. 

At first, he set it on the singular dressed awkwardly - changing it when Dany sat back on the bed. He pulled up a chair and set the tray between them. Dany took a plate, picking some pancakes and fruits first. He had gotten both coffee and juice for them - Dany first took the juice.

They ate in silence for a short while. It wasn't that she wanted to, but that she didn't know how not to. 

“Thank you,” Dany wound up saying. At least it was relevant.

Jon shrugged. “Not everyone goes well with crowds. Don't worry about it.”

“_Not_ _everybody_ does what you did - all of it. Thank you for that, too.”

He shook his head. “I told you -”

“I know what you told me. But it doesn't mean I can't be grateful for it.” She had busied herself with cutting pieces of her pancake. But when she realized that Jon had not been, she looked up at him. He was looking at her. 

Dany no longer liked the quiet. “Last night,” she's started, shifting a bit. “Last night you said you knew how it felt? How did you know? How it felt...and what I was feeling?”

The question was a big one - one that could also easily be invasive. Dany realized that after saying it, and dropped her eyes.

But Jon didn't seem to mind.

“Desperation, I think. It's one of the feelings you can just see him, no matter what the meaning for whatever reason.”

“What's another?” She was curious.

“Love, I would say.” It was a strong word, and he said it as such. “I grew up with one always pairing with the other. And when you do, you know when others are experiencing the same thing. A dangerous pair, those feelings can be.”

Somehow, it all made sense. She didn't know what to do with it. Such words could only even be conceived by someone who meant it. Who knew it for a while, and the importance and the effect it had on another.

She ran the words through her head; once, twice, four times. It's set a certain way.

“Were…” She hesitated, licking her lips. “Were you running, too?”

It was the first time she admitted to exactly what she did. What she _ was _ doing. And that showed in Jon's face; confirmation. 

“No, not exactly.” He thought for a moment. “I have thought about it, though. When I was younger. But I don't know if it was anything more than melodramatics.”

“How old are you?”

“Twenty-five.”

“I’m twenty-three.”

“Twenty-three?” She nodded. “I thought you were younger. Not knowing how to drive and all.”

“You thought I was not able to drive because I was a teenager?”

“No, no,” He took it back quickly, an embarrassed look on his face. She smiled at it. “A lot of adults don't drive right away. You look young, too...it's usually parents that people are...running...from.”

He seemed really averse about his response, but she didn't mind. It made sense for what information he had been given.

“I wasn't allowed to learn. In case I wanted to...do this.” Her brother had been the closest thing to a parent for thirteen years. But Jon and her were strangers. Jon didn't have to know it all. She wouldn't want that burden on him, either.

Still not in, somehow or all right with the vagueness of the statement.

“Hey, I get it. If it wasn't for my uncle, I probably wouldn't be driving either.”

She assumed it was not for her same reasoning. But still she asked. 

“For the same reason?”

He shook his head. “I lived with my cousins all of my life. Their mother didn't like my mother, nor when she had to look after me when she died.”

Dany's eyes flickered. “Oh - I'm sorry.”

“Don't be. I never knew her.”

But it seemed that he grew up without a mother completely; and yet, something even worse. The idea of one hung in front of him, but neglect held it right out of his reach. Her own mother died when she was young; and selfishly, she would rather live with that pain than what he might have experienced. She at least knew what she should have.

“Well, I am sorry you didn't.”

He ran a hand through his hair.

“Sorry if this seems forward. But you seem very sympathetic for something you're running away from.”

For some reason, Dany's lips tugged up. She shook her head.

“I'm not running from my mother. It's...many things.”

Jon leaned closer, placing his hand at her wrist. Her gaze flicked up.

“I thank you, Dany.” Her breath caught. It was the first time she heard her new name since...well, her mother. “For trusting me. With your story and...well, your life.”

It was her turn to shake her head. She let her cheeks pinch into a smile.

“I should be thanking you.”

“You already did.”

“But not for trusting _ me _, just as much as I had to trust you. I was accusing you of being a murderer, and meanwhile, I just broke into your car.”

”May not have been my smartest choice, not going to lie.” They both laughed. Dany liked the way his eyes squinted but somehow seemed even bigger when he did it.

“I promise I'm not a murderer,” Dany clarified, rocking back over her tailbone.

“And I promise this isn't a long-winded homicide.” He held his hand out. Dany took it and shook it playfully.

They set their joined hands on the mattress along side of the tray. Jon's palms were warm - and although it was the cold metal of her heirlooms that anchored her, she found his hand was doing the same when it came to comfort.

They lapsed into a comfortable silence. She was looking at him, the same way she knew Jon was. Still, Dany wanted to make sure.

His eyebrows twitch. 

“What are you planning on doing now?”

Her lips parted. She honestly didn't know. She was so focused on actually leaving, balancing on the high possibility that she really wouldn't make it without getting caught. The car she would steal would act as her shelter, maybe, if she remembered her plan correctly. 

“I really don’t know. Not everything went to plan. I didn’t even think I would get this far.”

His eyes seemed impossibly dreamy in the morning light. His countenance held the same effect, but she could not get her mind across the deepening concern that was amoung it.

“Well, you still have a few days to figure it out.” He looked around. “I can lend you some money for new clothes, too.”

“No,” Dany decided, “You’ve done enough.”

“I told you I’d do this last night, and I’m not switching my answer.” He shut her down with the affirmation his voice was filled with. She sighed in defeat.

“Alright, fine.” he visibly relaxed at her agreeance. “But for no more than another night. That’s _ my _ answer, and I’m not changing it.” Jon closed his eyes.

“And what are you going to do then?” he sounded annoyed, and frankly, Dany got annoyed at the thought of _ him _ being annoyed. At what? Her deciding to get off his back? She looked to the window to calm herself. The horizon reminded her of the beach, and the beach reminded her of dresses. A feeling she wanted to know.

“I haven’t seen much of the world. And I do want to see it.” 

“There’s not much to see.” _The horizon reminded her of the beach, and the beach reminded her of dresses. A feeling she wanted to know._

“Well, maybe you’ve just seen the wrong parts of it.” Her face became hard with defiance as she turned back at him. Nonetheless, Jon’s face split into a grin.

“Perhaps I have.” 

His smile was just too inviting. Her muscles betrayed her as she bite back her own smile. It was odd, the next few moments, when neither said anything.

Jon’s other hand came to cover the rest of her own. He shifted his position, and his demeanor. 

“Last night was bad. It usually is, but it was..._ really _ bad.” Dany grew confused at his admission. Where it was coming from, _ why _? But she deviated into attentivity, listening to the man who was only asking for this in return for his humanity, so it seemed. “And so I left. I can’t always do that. But I saw the opportunity, and I took it.”

Her throat burned at the true recognition of their similar situations. How could this be? How could two people so alike happen upon each other in such a coincidental time succession? Her hand twitched under his, and he looked at her. 

She kept her own gaze down in puzzlement… and in truth, fear, at the thought that was slowly coming into her head.

“So why are you going back so soon?”

She saw his eyes disappear behind his lids as his head dropped. His knee slowed into distracted bouncing. “I don’t know.”

Dany bit her cheek. It hurt to see this side of him - even after only knowing him for less than a morning.

Her mind went blank. But through the fog, a single memory ran; _ Run. You want to run. You just escaped once, you can do it again. Find a reason and a way and run. _

She took a shaky inhale as it overtook all her thoughts. She couldn't just...think that. It wasn’t her decision. It wasn't the same situation. It wasn't her _ life _.

Who was she, to even ask him why he was going back? Invasive, that's what. Invasive and _ beyond _ disrespectful, selfish, assumative and close minded, overall _ stupid _ -

“Dany.”

Her mind emptied. His voice sounded strange. 

“Dany, what if we get out of here.” 

She sniffed, glancing around, confused. “Where? Here? This...like, this room?”

“Not just that. This town. City. What if we just...drive. To wherever you haven't seen and wherever I want to see.”

“I haven't been anywhere. And I can't drive.”

“I’ll drive. I’ll teach you, too.”

She searched his face. He was in stark seriosity - but still, somehow, there was a softness that screamed at her to follow.

_ Nothing can help me now, can it? _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my favorite chapter so far i think:) theres alot of dialogue which i dont think im always great at, but hopefully im improving! its been a sucky day but being able to finish this chapter so soon brought some light at least.  
I usually manually write the chapter and then transcribe it. i tried this using a camera transcriber this time, so if there are any distracting mistakes, please let me know.  
we saw a bit more into dany's past, too. ive also only started chapter titles now; and intentionally. pay attention, and maybe you will catch on before the end where i explain it all:)
> 
> p.s: there is a simple, but somehow complex pattern that i am using when i describe her character. can anyone see it?


	4. disc V, track XVII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jon takes a trip to the beach. After leaving the hotel, Dany makes a big decision while they shop, and comes across something derailing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the wait! im hoping to have a regular posting schedule now that holidays are over. along with that, there were important parts in this chapter that i really needed to flesh out the rest of the plot plan in order to know if they fit right now. 
> 
> should be smooth sailing for now on!
> 
> enjoy this 6k+ chapter:)

The first thing that Jon understood about the beach was how windy it was. 

He constantly tried to keep up with Robb, both of their runs being slowed by the sand sinking underneath them. But Robb’s hair acted in the breeze’s favor, sweeping it back from his face. Jon wasn’t as lucky. His curls went everywhere but where he wanted them to go, plastering against his eyes and into his mouth. Which was precisely the reason he found himself tumbling into the sand as he fell over Robb, who had tripped up. 

“Jon!” a voice yelled out behind him. He was rubbing the sand out of his eyes, but he could still see Robb’s wince and hear who had called out. “I _ told you _ not get to sandy! Not two minutes, and look what you’ve done!” 

He blindly stood up, hastily trying to brush off as much sand as possible. “Sorry, Aunt Catelyn. I’ll make sure its all off.” he rubbed enough out of his eyes to open one of them. 

“You better hold yourself to that, or you’ll be walking home!”

Robb stood up and mussed up Jons head. Sand sprinkled down and bounced off of his clothing. 

“Don’t worry about it. Dad won’t let that happen.” 

Jon gave Robb a sheepish smile. That seemed to be said even more and more recently. And although it was true, Aunt Catelyn’s growing annoyance with him was, too. and it didn’t feel too good to know.

“Robb! I want to go swimming!” the sun caught Sansa’s red hair as her young legs took her across their path. All three of them continued to the edge of the water. “It might be cold. Oh, I’m scared. Robb! Check! Check if its cold!”

Robb shook his head and compiled. “No, it’s nice. Feel it, come on.”

Jon took a step closer, not knowing if he should or not. The water was probably going to make him sandy beyond return.

He never had to make the decision, though. They were called back in for the picnic that had been set up.

Going to the beach wasn’t a common thing for the Stark’s. They lived far away and they always seemed to bring the cold with them. So even when they finally made this visit, it wasn’t exactly for play. 

No one explained why exactly they were there. But no one cared, either. It was chilly but nice. It was exciting, even if they weren’t allowed to play in the sand or swim in the water. 

They all settled on the blanket, assorted with sandwiches and fruits and veggies. Young Arya and Bran sat on Uncle Ned’s lap and baby Rickon started to wake for his meal. Jon grabbed the pile of plates, handing them out to everyone and finding himself useful. 

As everyone finally settled with their food on their plates, a comfortable silence lapsed over them after the clinking of serving utensils died down. Little Arya assessed the scene and made quick work of the quie by releasing a babble of nonsense through her food filled mouth. Robb and Jon snickered. 

“_ Hush!” _ Catelyn scolded him. This was something usual. Arya had such a habit to talking with a mouth of food that they had resorted to not paying attention to her until she was clear of it. Jon quieted under the glare of his aunt, glancing to where his uncle was whispering reminders in Arya’s ear.

She chewed and swallowed. In the first moment of ability, she leaped out and pointed. 

“Friends!” 

Everyone turned to where her small finger pointed. There were people coming in through the mouth of high stones. 

Jon squinted. There was an odd aura about them, how the sun was hitting their heads. Uncle Ned moved Arya and Bran off of his lap. He stood up and looked down to his wife. 

“I’m going to introduce ourselves. Make sure we aren’t intruding on anything.”

Everyone watched him make his way over to them. There were two children running ahead of two men and a woman. Her dress blew behind her, sunlight streaming through the thin fabric, and Jon felt jealous. Everything seemed to work with the wind except his hair. 

He knew the beach was too pretty to be completely empty without a reason. From what he could understand by what Uncle Ned was doing, this beach and its dark, high stone cliffs were owned by a family. 

Aunt Catelyn attempted to direct their focus back to the meal. It _ was _ good, the cheese and meats in the sandwiches fresh and the juice sweet. Sansa grabbed the tin of cookies she situated and proudly showed them to everyone. 

Uncle Ned made his way back. One of the men watched him, still aways and sticking by his own group. Jon’s eyes carried to the children who have now dropped into the sand and seemed to be scooping it. 

“Stop staring, Jon. Its rude.” 

He stopped. 

“We’re okay. They own the beach, but visitors are allowed to come whenever they please. It’s just a dead time of year.” Uncle Ned sat back down and placed a kiss on the side of his wife’s head.

Robb made a joke. Everyone laughed. Sansa was complimented on her baking, Rickon played with, and Bran teased with an extra cookie.

Jon watched the children with the weird light hair play while their mother and her dress watched.

When the sun started to dip, they all packed up their basket and folded the blankets and brushed off the sand. Everything was packed into their car, the babies buckled in, and then they were back down the long road that they came. They were to hang around town until nightfall and then head their long way home. 

A bit up the hill, a fancy sign with fancy letters and a fancy gate came into view on his left. Jon looked out the window, his interest piqued, and Robb and Sansa followed.

“What does that sign say? Robb, what does it say?”

“Uh…” he squinted. “Tah….Tangary’s?”

“Targaryen’s,” Uncle Ned called from the front. “They are a wealthy family. This is one of their houses.”

“_ One _ of them?” Sansa exclaimed, and then whipped her head around to look at the house through the back windshield. “What are the other ones for, then?”

“To live in, of course.”

She sighed. “Imagine going home, but then having the option of which one!”

Jon looked at house disappearing behind him all a could see through the trees with a faint flash of a red door.

* * *

_ What am I doing? _

Each second was another pulse of that question through her whole core.

Excitement, or something of that sort, fueled both of their veins as soon as Dany agreed with a distinct dip of her head. Jon made sure that she _ was _sure, and the next thing they know, the room keys were unceremoniously dropped off at the front desk.

Breakfast had cleared - at least the heavy crowd rush - but it didn’t stop Dany from pushing her beanie down until it tickled her eyebrows. She trailed close to Jon, barely refraining from holding onto his elbow. Although the crowd was gone, so was night, replaced by the increasing possibility that Viserys had people out looking for her.

It was why she only felt safer now - balled back into the passenger side of Jon’s Camaro. The seats’ leather was cold, but between her thoughts and pounding heartbeat, her body couldn’t care less.

She watched Jon situate himself at the wheel, quickly turning to the windshield in front of her. At the sound of the keys, her thoughts became ever so much louder than before.

_ What. Are. You. Doing. _

The engine stuttered. It earned Jon’s curse. He tried again, but the car failed to start.

“This car’s shit. Just have to give it a few minutes.”

Dany nodded cautiously. Her arms wrapped around her torso, trying to shut out the impending thoughts and the cold. 

The seat squeaked as Jon sat back. The break in their energy slowed her heartbeat.

Her focus scattered to places she couldn’t keep hold of. From her mind, to the car that was going to take place in a...beginning.

But then it strayed to the sky, another reminder; the rising sun. And along with it, the diminishing period of time that she could pretend she was safe. The danger that this trip was becoming. Trip? Is that even an inappropriate name? Would they get far enough for it to be seen as such?

She had asked Jon why he wouldn't want to go back. He had asked her if they should just leave.

_ To where, _ was a question that circled around the back of her mind, unanswered because she did not ask it. 

It was a silent setting. Jon sounded out of breath, like his heart still have not caught up to what his brain was guiding his body to do. She could barely blame him - the adrenaline was still talking from mine of the long run of this decision. The only difference that Dany saw was how she was attempting to hold her breath into herself, to not show what effect this was happening on her. It was something her body was used to - hiding the weakness. 

His curls brushed against the headrest as he turned to her. she felt his eyes and took her own off the sky as the flicked her thoughts away and to him.

It was a countenance she had yet to see on Jon. Something of a mix - concern, doubt, and maybe a little bit of holding something back. Nevertheless, it left her mouth parted, endlessly prepared to say something that she could never be able to understand if we could enjoy her.

Jon stepped in.

“You've...gotten quiet.” His voice was a mask of confidence over anxiety. The contrast unsettled her.

“What do you mean?” She swallowed as it came out shaky.

“Well... Are you, uh - all right? Is this too fast?” Her vision refocused as his dynamic dropped. She was used to things in her life - her life as a whole, really - turning around faster than she would please. But she had never been the one to flip that switch.

“It's... a lot. I'm all right, though. Just need time to let it soak in.”

It felt blasterous to say. She already had _ hours _ to let it absorb. That was more than enough time compared to what she had in the past.

“We can wait. Stay another night, think about it.”

Dany thought of the breakfast crowd. She looked to her left, where morning buzz zoomed down the highway. She readjusted her hat.

“No, we...we need to go.” It came out...more as a snap. Not something she intended, but rather the pop of the bubble blooming in her throat that burns with the reminder of her brother. “It's a lot, but I need to do this,” She rephrased. It sounded better, even to her own ears.

She wasn’t looking at him, but knew he nodded after a moment. He shifted forward, preparing to start the engine again. Dany sudden opened her mouth, words caught on her tongue.

“You aren’t completely convinced. I can tell,” Dany said. The keys were in the ignition, but at her statement, Jon paused a thought of going further. “But you’ve already done so much for me. I’m not going to hold you back or waste your money just so I can think in a room about whether or not I want to go somewhere I’ve never went. I can think on the road.”

Dany gave into the eye contact that she was avoiding. But against what she expected, Jon’s eyes were kind - amused. 

“A determined thing, you are,” he said, breaking into a smile. He shook his head as the car started.

Dany bit her cheeks and looked ahead. As they left the parking lot, she felt herself more at ease. 

This would have its end. There is no way it won’t. Her brother was going to find her eventually. But Jon had said it - she _ was _determined. To take the time she had and find her daydreams. 

* * *

As they went past the hotel, further down the highway, Dany’s heart was fluttering in a way that she couldn’t understand. It was the same feeling as the one that made her heels on fire when they were leaving the room and dropping the keys off. Somewhere along the way, Jon turned some music on that made it even more exciting. He showed her how to roll down the windows, and she did a little bit. The morning air was a bit chilly, but it was also refreshing and felt good against her hand as she glided it through the wind made by the cars speed.

It was when she found herself bouncing her head to the beat, when she realized her cheeks hurt because she had been smiling without knowing it. When she caught Jon’s hands tapping the wheel, when she adjusted her hat with more energy than necessary and her eyes were wide with something other than fright.

She thought she knew adrenaline. The feeling of accidentally walking downstairs when Viserys had his friends over. Turning the corner off of her street and realizing she could no longer see the manse, nor the lights that it gave off between the trees.

Who knew there could be two kinds?

And then there was that sense of endlessness in front of them.

They came up and over hills, giant curves and side streets on to more highway. All of it had a certainty of road in front of them. 

Dany wondered if it was the same as being on the edge of the sea. 

She didn’t know why her mind kept coming back to that comparison. But it was forgetting to think constantly. In the one time she _ needed _ to think, that they were driving specifically for the reason of her decision, her mind couldn’t focus on anything but the infinitincy of the ocean. 

She was getting the feeling of wind against her by her hand out the window. She had no care for where her hat was falling to, and there was a breeze against her neck that was pleasant and...assuring. 

It was so close to what she imagined, and yet so unlike what she knows it feels like. 

* * *

Jon stared straight ahead. His CD marked a familiarity of his regular drives, but it was something much different, and felt as such. 

It had all happened so fast, so unpredictable, and with such a lack of thought that he knew they were probably going to die if they continued.

And yet, he put a blinker on for the next exit, farther away from home. 

The tension was still there... but softer, different from what it was previously. He understood it. He was surprised that she was so...so _ trusting _ of him. Jon honestly didn’t get it. Especially depending on how much trust she seemed to lack in her life. Every thing about the girl screamed inexperienced, but not stupid. 

He didn’t want to think of how bad her situation was, though. If it was bad enough that she was taking the risk of getting kidnapped and killed rather than going back.

He snuck glances at her, and was surprised to see her loosen. All he had seen of her so far was closer to a baby deer without her mother - but just in the past hour of him driving, she was opening into...well, a girl. Someone who looked closer to the age she said rather than the teenager he first thought she was.

He hadn’t heard her speak since the parking lot. He also didn’t mind it - like she said she needed to think, he wanted to take the time as well. It looked like he had less at stake, but in a way, they may have equal amounts. No love and just enough love in eachothers lives can be similar in that way.

In a situation like Dany’s, leaving her household seemed to be dangerous because of the little care those around her held. But then, at the same time, they cared just enough control to invoke the danger of her leaving them.

Jon was around enough love for it to hurt them when he left. But it was also not enough to stay.

And he thought that maybe Dany had read that situation, and that's why she agreed for him to help her. She looked like someone who read people well. And she in no way proved him otherwise. Besides her show of some social anxiety in the lobby.

At some points of the drive, he found himself turning onto side streets. Just driving to drive, making long winded circles throughout random towns. He was watching his gas tank, slowly draining from where it started last night, and wondered how he was honestly going to pay for more. He hadn't brought too much money with him. He wasn't completely planning on...well, leaving.

Dany had rolled up the window some time into their suburban venture. She now just stared out the window, pressed back into the seat, as if something was going to stare back. Her eyes danced over every house and garden. A smile was set on her lips, one of the ones that was there without the person knowing it. It made Jon smile to himself. 

Eventually he turned back onto the highway. It was a bit of a mistake, but it wasn’t like they were going anywhere specific. They would just wind up wherever, and then worry about going home. Whenever that would be.

“I think I made up my mind,” Dany said. They were in a peaceful silence for so long that Jon couldn't help but look at her when he heard her. She was squinting her eyes in focus at something ahead. He followed her eyes, but there were no cars in front of them. He waited for an answer, not exactly knowing if he should prompt her. 

“I want to go to the beach.”

“T-the beach?” he dropped a hand to his lap. “Out of everything in the world, the beach.”

“Yeah, why? Is there something wrong with that?”

“No, it’s just...there will be a lot of people at a beach. And it’s not exactly what i thought your answer would be.”

She was silent for a moment. Jon was overtaken with guilt - she probably had never even gone. And at this point, it was probably close. What did it matter where she wanted to go?

“It’s just a feeling. Something of a want that I think my mind has mistaken for a need.”

He tapped twice on the wheel. Her words didn’t sound like she was asking to go there so she could sunbathe. “Alright. I know a place. We can get there.”

Dany hugged her knees into her chest and took a slightly unsteady breath.

They had a destination.

* * *

Turns out, they could not get there. 

Jon pulled they into a gravel parking lot just in time for his car to give in to itself. He knew he needed gas, but...the engine didn’t agree with anything close to an empty tank, it seemed. 

They had driven another hour. It was mostly Jon just trying to figure out where they were and which way they were to go. Driving aimlessly didn’t work as much in their favor as they once thought.

Dany turned to him, confused. He wouldnt be surprised if she was thinking that he was finally going to murder her.

“Sorry. We ran out.”

“Of gas?”

Jon nodded. “I saw a sign - there’s a station up the road. I thought we could make it, but it looks like we gotta walk. Sorry.” 

Dany shook her head dismissively. “I don’t mind.”

She stepped out of the car without much of a thought. 

Jon watched her, huffing in disbelief. He grabbed his keys and his extra denim jacket for their walk. It was warming as the afternoon continued, but it was still chilly because of the winter months.

She waited for him at the back of his car, hands tucked under her arms.

Jon shrugged on his jacket and started their trek.

After a bit, the crisp air started to burn his nose. Dany didn’t seem to mind, though. Her eyes were going over the trees that hung over the road, the stream deep to their left, the old leaves coating the floors of the woods. Watching her astonishment made him find his own appreciation in what was around them as well. Something he never thought to do. It was something he was quickly finding to like about her; she always tended to make him find interest in the smaller things, the normal things. 

The trees ended on one side, opening up to small, independent businesses. A row of back-end quick shops, a deli, and the gas station at the furthest end. He caught her pulling her beanie lower. He had noticed that to be something she did often. It was clear she was paranoid of _ someone _recognizing her. Or something like that. Which was odd with them being this far out of town. 

They made it to the station. Dany attached her heel to her opposite toe with each step, walking in line with a path made by tires in the gravel. 

As they got to the door, the _Sorry,_ _we’re closed_ sign came into view. Jon cursed. At the sound of it, Dany’s delicate chin perked up to him. 

“What gas station is closed at,” he paused to check his watch, “One in the afternoon?” If they had the car with them, it would be fine. But since it was empty Jon would have to either call for a tow or buy a single gallon to get them up the street.

Dany went up to the glass, peering through the cups of her hands. “Two mugs, television is still on. They aren’t closed.”

She was observant, he could give her that. But the sign, the lack of _ anyone _ inside, and the lights off said otherwise. “I beg to differ.”

“For lunch, maybe, yes. I don’t see many cars around here. They probably weren’t expecting anyone to show up.”

“Stupid expectation.” he turned towards the parking lot. Although it was specifically for the gas station, and no one was _ in _the gas station, there was one car in the lot.

Dany followed his eyes. “We can knock.”

He didn’t want to admit it, but he was rather surprised with her confidence. It seemed like they just needed to get some different air in her lungs. 

Jon followed her suggestion. Once, twice, three times. There was no response. 

He sighed in frustration, spinning and pacing down the steps. When he turned back, Dany was crouching in line with the door knob, picking the lock.

“_ Dany!” _ he hissed. 

“They won’t know. Their car is gone.”

“_ One _car is gone. That can come back any minute.”

“And if so, we exit through the back door, and then come back to the front. People forget to lock things sometimes.”

“And the other?”

“If someone is inside, the door was unlocked, but we knocked to see if they were open.”

He rubbed his face. All of the excuses would make sense.

“I’m not stealing,” he said as Dany straightened, opening the door. 

“We can leave money on the desk.”

“How many times have you done this?” It was a stupid question. He knew it was, and he was even more stupid for asking it.

“You get good at ways out over the years.” She disappeared into the first aisle before he could make anything of her answer. 

Jon shook it off, immediately going to the corner of the store with single gallons of gasoline. The way they were just in the open unsettled him with how many people actually did come in here. Not enough for the cashier to warrant worry over someone setting the place on fire.

Nor people breaking in during the middle of the afternoon, apparently. At least Dany specialized in lock picking and not window smashing.

He grabbed a small case of water, too. It would be a pain to carry back, but it was better to have it just in case. And a few maps. He didn’t want to waste time figuring out which one would suit where they were going.

Jon was comparing granola bars when he realized he hadn’t heard a peep from Dany. She must have been even more light on her feet than he thought. But as if she heard his thoughts, Jon heard paper rip. 

_ What the hell? _

Immediately, he turned to the register. Surely someone must have been here after all. But Dany’s voice quietly boomed from behind him. 

“Jon, we have to go.” his stomach clenched at the pure _ terror _ in her voice. 

He whipped around to her. Her appearance caught him off guard - she had pulled the hood of her thin jacket over her beanie and crossed the front flaps completely across her torso. The only place he could see her hair - and frankly, know it was her - was a small space at the nape of her neck.

He almost punched himself when his instincts looked for the outline of a gun anywhere. She looked anywhere but him. As if each shelf was about to come in and squeeze the life out of her.

His heart’s broken pieces trailed behind him as he barreled towards her, attempting to catch her focus by bringing his hands to her shoulders. 

“What? Did something happen? Is someone here? What’s wrong?”

It seemed like she couldn’t hear any of the spitfire of questions that slipped out of him. Instead, her eyes flicked across his torso as they became glossy. 

A breath came out of her mouth. She tried to take it back in, but all that came was a gasp of nothing. 

“I - I don’t -” She tried to take in air again, the attempts becoming faster as they failed. “- Can’t - I can’t -”

Tears fell as panic gripped her. Too much panic - she couldn’t breathe. 

“Sit down,” he told her, voice cracking. He pushed her shoulders down, following her descent, and situated her against the shelf. “Breathe in through your nose.”

She shook her head, clutching her chest, his bicep. Her hair stuck to her tears. 

“_ Dany _ . I need you to breathe with me. Look at me.” Her finger tips dug into him as she gave in to his command. “Watch me. I’m going to breathe in -” Jon did, heavily through his nose, counting to three in his head. He held it and then exhaled. She looked at his nose, his mouth, _ fuck _, his brain should not being thinking like that right now - and tried to follow.

Jon breathed in again, watching her try to take a stuttering breath through her mouth. He shook his head. “No, through your nose. Breathe with me.” 

He repeated it again. This time, her nostrils flared as she matched with him, her breath skipping in shakes as she inhaled and exhaled. But slowly, they evened. They were as long as his own. 

Jon lingered his focus on her one last second before ripping a water bottle out of the container. He opened it and pressed it to her lips.

Her own hand closed over his, accepting the sips, not minding some of dribbling down her chin. She leaned forward when she was done and wiped her face. 

“I’m sorry, I-”

“Don’t apologize for anything.” he closed the bottle and crushed it back in with the others. He had never thought he’d be the one helping another when it came to an attack. And he didn’t understand why it felt so good knowing he could help.

“No, Jon, I mean it -” her voice choked up as tears poured freely. He snapped back up to her, bewildered by her state. “We have to leave. He - they…”

“_ Who, _ Dany. Is there someone here?” it was probably stupid asking that now, considering all the noise they had made. But maybe she found someone hurt? 

“_ Was _ . _ Was _ here…” she trailed off, brushing past him to stand up. It was too sudden, and she basically crashed onto the opposite shelf. But Dany recovered quickly.

It was clear that they just had to leave for him to get an answer. She was too stressed, her mind too heightened on one thing. 

“Alright, okay. We’ll leave right now, go put the gas in, and just have to make a quick stop back -”

_ “No. _ We - we can‘t… he was _ here _. To...” 

Jon stood up. He watched her pace for one too many times before assessing the options. He scanned the store. His eyes landed on the car parked outside. The decision dangled in his mind, but he grabbed at it before it teased him.

He walked past her, behind the counter, slapping the estimated cost of the shit they were buying on top of it. 

“Wh-what are you doing?”

Jon snatched what he was looking ofr on the hook on the far back of the counter. It was always the far back of the counter. 

He jangled the car keys by his ears, watching Dany’s face twist into confusion. She looked at the singular car in the parking lot and back to him as Jon walked towards the door.

“Wha - we’re _ stealing a car? _ ” she chased after him, snatching up the water bottle case. “You didn’t want to go into an empty convenience store, but stealing a _ car _, you are okay with?”

Jon turned to face her, leaning back against the door to open it. “You’re not giving me much of another option. And were not stealing the car. We found the keys, and are using its resources.”

“I -” she followed him out, stepping down the steps. “I don’t think that’s right.”

“Nor is the way you are acting about _ someone _ being _ somewhere _ .” he hated being insensitive, but it was the truth. He had no idea what that was about, and the only way he would find out is if they got out of there. He rounded to the drivers side. Dany paralleled him at the passenger door, peering at him wide eyed over the roof. “Look, you said we need to get out of here. My car is a mile or two up the road, dead, and we have a _ working _ one in front of us. Cars get stolen all the time.”

“They’ll find yours.”

“We’ll be long gone before they connect the dots.”

“And what if they find us anyway, when they do?”

Jon shook his head, feeling the smug smirk.

“They won’t find us. I know some places.”

“Places?” she raised her eyebrows. 

He wasn’t able to answer. 

A car sped up the road, swinging into the lot. Jon and Dany found themselves slipping into the car in a flash, the engine revving and him stepping on reverse before they left too much room for realization. Still, even as he sped out of the lot, Dany saw a dingy woman throw herself out of the passenger side of the other car and ran part way into the street, screaming after them, as she twisted to look through the back window. 

The woman soon got too far away to be worth looking at. Dany pulled herself around, crashing back into the seat a little out of breath. There it was again. That adrenaline.

She let out a few huffs, causing Jon to look over at her. She appreciated it - she knew he was checking to see if she was alright, that these breaths weren’t another...attack. 

But they weren’t. In fact, her breaths turned into a breathy laugh, and then quickly into a full one. She collapsed forward and caught her shaking head in her hands. She could not believe they just stole a car. 

“It’ll be fine,” Jon said. Maybe she had said that out loud. “This car isnt that new, either. So many of my sibling’s cars have been stolen at the mall.” 

Dany turned to him. Jon had never talked about his family. Then again, she hadn’t either. 

She reached into her pockets, searching for the rings, for their familiar cold metal. Instead, she came in contact with paper. 

Shit. That. 

The flyer with her face and name and _ reward _ on it. 

Dany took it out of her pocket, unraveling it slightly. She could only see a bit of her eye - it was an old picture. She could tell because she was smiling in it, and it was really the only picture she could remember taking. 

Viserys was there. Where she was standing. Or one of his guys, or an officer who was already in charge of finding her. Not only did Viserys already know, but he was already taking action. 

How long had it been there? When was it put up? Did Jon’s car running out of gas save them from coming face to face with the person who put it up? It could’ve been four hours or twenty minutes. And Dany couldn’t decide which unsettled her more.

Dany ignored Jon’s glance at what she had just taken out of her pocket as she searched for the window lever. She located it, unrolled the glass an inch, and then squeezed the ball of it through. She left the window open to try to remove the musty smell that the owner left behind. 

“What the hell was that?” Jon watched the rearview mirror, even though it was long unseen. 

“A missing poster,” Dany spoke truthfully. “For me.”

The car slowed as his foot came off of the gas. “A miss - _ what? _ Already?”

“My brother gets around fast.”

He looked at her. “Your brother?”

_ Shit _. Dany didn’t know exactly how much would be too much, but that much definitely was. “Uh - yea. Older brother. He’s...he’s protective over me.”

“It doesn’t sound like it’s the right overprotective that you are talking about, considering what happened back there.”

The truth of it made her stop too long for any denial to be seen as authentic. She wringed together her fingers and then swallowed.

“So, um, you said you_ know of places to go. _”

“Key word _ of _. But yes, I know a place. That also checks your beach visit off the list, too.”

Dany looked at him and smiled. But it faded as the wind finally hit her nerves. And with that, understanding. Viserys knew. Viserys was taking action. Viserys had people everywhere. This far out. They had just begun, and yet, the end is in such looming hindsight. 

“Alright,” Dany agreed with a tip of her head. “But only if you promise me one thing.”

“Depends on what the promise is.”

Dany swallowed. She could hear the curiosity in his voice - whether it be his interest with her ignorance of his assumptions about Viserys, or maybe her voice had become more serious than she heard it.

His hand rested on the console. She felt a need to hold it as she said it. When she did, the car slowed down to a complete stop in the middle of the road. He looked at their hands, and then at her, as she shifted to face him fully. 

Dany traced his finger nails.

“Promise me that you will remember me. When this is all over. That I won’t just be a fever dream come to life in the back of your thoughts when this all comes to an end.”

His palm turned over, and he grasped her hand.

“Where did you ever get the idea that you would be that? That you are nothing but a passing circumstance?”

“It’s the only idea I have lived with. There has been too much hope given into too much disappointment. At this point, all I ask is for this to be as much of an experience for you as it will be for me.”

She could see him sorting out what she had said in her head. Her arms and legs erupted in an uncomfortable heat.

“Jon, please. Just promise me that you will remember.”

His jaw worked in itself. But he nodded, and pressed on the gas. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sooo hey yall!
> 
> we got some jon POV! it was unexpected for me but i just found myself writing it and rolled with it. this story is really about giving the charcters what they deserved in canon when it comes to healing. thats what most of my fics are about these days anyway. 
> 
> i really wanna tell you guys how much went into the BTS of this chapter, but im afraid itll reveal something that im going to leave it up to you guys to find out. ill explain it at the end though, surely!
> 
> im hoping to update my canon divergent story With My Cold Blade next, so if you would like to maybe check that out, itd be cool:)
> 
> also, heres a link to my Jonerys Secret Santa Fic, On My Mind that i think you all would like! its full of our Broody Boi and sweet Dany and fluffiness that we all deserve. 
> 
> Sorry for the self promo, haha. but yea, im excited to see what you guys thought of this one:)
> 
> find me @ gylbertblithe on tumblr if you wanna talk:)


	5. nature's assistance in reconciliation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daenerys says a final, unsatisfying goodbye to her mother. Jon and Dany find a surprise in their newly-stolen car.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please see end notes for chapter warnings if you are effected by death in familial terms. 
> 
> IMPORTANT AUTHOR'S NOTE, PLEASE READ:
> 
> Hey everyone! So we have a quick update today - but before another one, I would like to make you guys aware of a TITLE CHANGE for this story. It will be enacted the same time as the next chapter releases (hopefully next friday). 
> 
> When I initially titled this story, I was under the impression due to tumblr that the word Drapetomania meant "the strong, immutable urge to run away", and was like, huh, sweet. But I have recently became aware that the word was derived from 1800's doctors in regards to a reason as to why African slaves were attempting to escape. I feel deeply uncomfortable with naming my story with a term like this.
> 
> Henceforth, this story will be renamed "WONDERLAND". 
> 
> Thank you for understanding, and enjoy the read!

_ _

_ Swish, swish, swish. _

Her toes were cold.

_ Swish, swish, swish. _

The front of her shoes were wet. 

_ Swish, swish, swish. _

The grass in front of her was full of pretty dew drops on top of them. They went away when she walked across.

_ Swish, swish, swish. _

She wanted to stop walking. She wanted to stop destroying the pretty path ahead of her.

_ Swish swish swish. _

Someone touched her hair. She looked up. It was her father. He stared straight ahead. His face was bored. She waited for him to say something, but he didn't. His hands swayed as he walked. She looked at it and realized he didn't mean to touch her.

_ Swish swish swish. _

She looked back at her feet.

_ Swish swish. _

She combed her hair behind her ears.

_ Swish swish swish. _

It was frizzy. She couldn't figure out how to braid it.

_ Swish swish swish swish. _

She couldn't reach the back to brush it, either.

_ Swish, swish, swish, swish, swish. _

They had been running late that morning because her buttons were off by one every time she tried to close her sweater up.

_ Swish, swish, swish, swish, swish, swish. _

She couldn't reach where her brush always went when Mama was done with doing her hair, and her outfits were told to be either too hot or too cold for what it was outside when she was told to get changed.

_ Swish, swish, swish, swish, swish, swish, swish. _

Rhae wound up helping her. Papa wasn't home. Vissy was with him. He said they had something to do before the service. Daenerys wished she could have went with them. She missed Vissy. 

_ No _. Viserys. Nicknames were for babies, and Vissy wasn’t his name. That’s what he told her. And she didn’t want to be a baby.

She missed Mama, too. But she wasn’t coming back with them.

S_ wish, swish, swish, swish, swish, swish, swish, swish. _

“Stop dragging your feet. The car will get muddy. I have a meeting later today.”

“Sorry,” she whispered. She was jealous of Papa. She didn't have a distraction like he did. Besides the sound the the grass made when they pushed their feet through it. But Papa just told her to stop. Other people didn’t stop, though.

Her fingers were cold. Her one pocket was full of tissues and the other held Dragonelle. Daenerys took her out to stuff her fingers in instead.

“No toys,” Papa said. “Read the room.”

He took Dragonelle out of her hand. She was put into his pocket. Daenerys lingered at where she disappeared for a second and then stared straight, confused. They weren't in the room. They were outside, on a grassy hill.

_Swish, swish, swish, swish,_ _swish, swish, swish, swish, swish._

She turned around. A lot of other people were behind them. _ They _ were dragging _ their _ feet. She was jealous of them, too. Although, they didn't have a meeting later to distract them like Papa did. So maybe she should not have been jealous of them.

Vissy stared straight ahead, too. _ Viserys. Viserys. Viserys. _He looked old. Older than Rhaegar, who caught her stare and gave her a tiny smile. His finger twirled, telling her to turn back around.

She did. But then the path broke into steep stone stairs. Daenerys grabbed her hand on to Papa's finger for balance. He shook her free of it.

She took her time, then. Her legs were too small for the height to not be daunting.

“Come on, Daenerys,” Viserys said. He bumped into her back.

“Sorry,” she said.

She was picked up. Rhae - _ Rhaegar _ \- hooked his arms under her legs. Daenerys turned her head on his shoulder. Everyone was marching behind her. She didn't know who they were.

_ Swish, swish, swish, swish, swish, swish, swish, swish, swish, swish. _

Daenerys decided she hated the color black by the time they got to the car.

The wrong hands buckled her into her car seat. The wrong person sat next to her. There was an empty seat, and it felt wrong. She looked out the window as they drove away. Mama wasn't following. 

She hated that sound.

_ Swish, swish, swish. _

_ Swish, swish. _

“There! Did you hear it?”

Dany whipped her head around the car again. Jon partially took his eyes off the long expanse of the road in front of them to glance in the backseat.

“Maybe I did,” he admitted. His eyebrows furrowed.

“What in the Gods’ names could be moving in here?” Although the car was a bit musty, it was also empty. The two of them were the only things that were in there besides the seats, there case of waters, and a stray jacket left by the owner. That they stole the car from.

And something has been making noise for the past _ hour _. At least Dany claimed that it was.

“Maybe there is something in the trunk. We can check, if it's really annoying you.”

“No, it's all right. I'm just curious.” There wasn't anywhere they could park, anyway. They were on a narrow road, barely big enough for two lanes, lined with grassy plains. 

They had been there for awhile. Once they went over a giant hill the left the small town with the gas station completely out of sight, the only thing they _ could _see was the supposed country-side of the land.

Which was good in a way. They hadn’t happened on another car since then.

The CD in the player reset its loop. It was from a band neither had ever heard before and there was no case for it to give them a clue in the car. So they just put it on for background noise.

The air was the same type of crisp that it was when she opened to window in Jon’s car. But the grass held a distinct smell to it that Dany had yet to decide if she liked.

The sun was full and pretty much right in front of them as the afternoon started to make it dip. Jon had brought down his sunvisor, but it’s rays still gave his face a distinguished glow. His eyes had brightened, too, but somehow his face still found its own shadows.

He felt her eyes on him. They were there for an odd amount of time and he really didn’t know what to do about it. So Jon simply stared straight ahead, tapping his hand to the beat. 

At the first semi-shoulder, Jon pulled them over. They needed to stretch their legs and he needed to _ actually _ figure out where they were going. 

He knew where. But he had no idea how to get there. And he hoped he grabbed enough maps from that store in order for one to help them just a bit. 

Dany took her head off of the head rest. He could tell she was tired. Her eyes didn’t have the certain wideness to them, and instead her eyelashes seemed to soften and flutter more often. Or maybe that was just how she looked in the sun.

She watched him leave the car and stretch his arms over his head. Dany turned away as she saw a sliver of skin, face heating as she realized that she noticed something like that, and got out as well. She did the same stretch and sighed when she felt the muscles lengthen. 

Jon pulled out some maps from his pocket where he stuffed them. Dany rounded to the back, her curiosity taking over her. It could very well be just a loose piece...but the trunk may have stuff in it, anyway.

Her fingers pressed underneath the handle until she felt the lever. She pulled it and pushed the hood open. 

“Oh…” her throat released. Dany felt her hand come up to her mouth as she took a small step back.

The gravel ground crunched as Jon walked over, pausing at her side as he assessed the situation as well.

“Well, shit.”

Dany glanced up at him before returning back to the trunk. Inside, wrapped in a thin tarp, was a litter of kittens huddled in the gulf of their un-moving mother. 

She went to move towards them. But Jon put a hand on her shoulder, replacing her stance with his own. 

“Dany,” he started. She looked at the hand on her shoulder. And then his face. It was full of sadness she didn’t think she had seen before. On anyone. He searched for what he wanted to say. 

“I know,” Dany helped him. She took his hand off of her shoulder and continued forward.

There were three of them. They huddled together, toppling over each other, pawing at their mother’s stomach. When Dany scooped the dark one up, she felt how cold it was. She handed it to Jon and took her jacket off, grabbing the two others and placing them in the warmth left from her body heat.

She turned to Jon to take the other, finding him holding it up with one hand and looking at it like he would a fancy goblet. 

“Jon! Give me that!” she wrapped her hand around its cold belly and placed it with its siblings.

“They are lucky,” Jon observed. “The mother probably froze to death.” 

She looked at him as she situated the kittens against her chest, and then pulled attention to the mother. The kittens on her chest were homeless. They were orphans. Just like her.

_ Swish, swish, swish. _

Dany squeezed her eyes shut. A memory of a cheap, wooden casket, a thrown away affair, haunted behind them.

“We…” she sniffed. “She should be buried. We can’t just…”

“We won’t.” Jon went to move and pick the mother up.

“Wait -” Dany stopped him. He looked at her expectantly. Her eyes danced between them, thinking. She… she needed…

She remembered the feeling. Going home and something about it not feeling as such anymore. Papa had a business meeting later that day, and didn’t even change. Her shoes were taken away to be washed, but there was no need - she couldn’t look at them ever again. Every time she did, her toes would get cold, and she would get this weird pressure in her chest and her head. 

Daenerys always thought that maybe, since Mama wasn’t there, Dragonelle would have been able to give her company. But Papa never gave Dragonelle back to her. He didn’t give Mama a proper goodbye, either. Mama wanted to be released back into the world. At least that was what she told Dany. She wanted to become one with the earth, to turn into ashes and be spread off of a cliff. So her spirit could decide where it wanted to go.

_ Dragons don’t burn _, Papa said when Daenerys told him. And then she was put into the special box and into the ground. Maybe she would be partially happy. She was at least with the rest of the Targaryen’s, even if she wasn’t directly related. And she was in the earth. Sure, with wood separated the real feeling of it, but...wood was Earth, too. It grew from it. Sure, it could work. 

...Dany needed to give this mother what she deserved. She gave her life for her children. She deserved to be honored as such.

And her children were not going to to be treated in vain. They deserved to be cared for. 

“I - I’ll take her.”

Jon watched, stunned, as she passed the bundle of kittens over to him.

Their eyes met for a second - her own screamed _ let me do this _. He nodded and took a step back. Dany scooped the cat up carefully. She was silver, despite her litter being all but.

Her eyes skimmed over it. Searching for what, Dany had no idea. It was dead. The cat was dead, and had been.

“We... We can't just... We should bury her.” Dany swept past him, her bare elbow brushing his denim jacket. She walked to the edge of the grass and looked around for something that would hold as a suitable place. The dirt was softer right where the grass started.

She dropped to her knees. Her throat burned.

Dany placed the tarp to the side, looking at the ground ahead of her, trying to figure out how to go about this. She had nothing. No shovel or box or grave marker. How was she going to do this?

She jumped at a hand on the shoulder. Jon was there, looking down at her. His hair looks less black and more brown where the sun streamed through it from behind him. It highlighted all of the correct parts of his face, while still finding the correct parts in the shadows. It was something that Dany was noticing to happen with him more and more. And along with it, was learning that it was what she liked about his looks.

“Okay,” he said simply. She looked at him dumbfounded. But then she saw him swallow and give the tiniest nod of his head. “Okay.”

Dany braced her hands on her knees and stood up quickly. She backed away and watched Jon fill her space.

She wrapped her arm around her torso, the other one wiping her nose with the back of it. She watched him assess the soil, and then take a handful of the long grass into his fists and unrooted them. He folded them in half and used the dense, folded end as a shovel of sorts.

It was odd to watch someone dig a grave. All of the funerals she had been to had been pre-dug. Frankly, she hadn't been to many, only one and a half, but she would think they still counted. 

It was also odd to know that this mother wouldn't have anything but a thin, ripped tarp separating her from the Earth. Mama wanted to be a part of the Earth again, which Dany couldn't give to her. But she didn't know if she would want to be one with the Earth like this cat, where her only friend would be worms. Although Dany thought she would rather worms than the insular aspect of the coffin. A tear dropped at the reminder that she was not given what she wanted. This cat would receive it for her, Dany supposed. At least half of the wish.

She knew Jon was done when he sat back on his heels. He didn't look at her, but somewhere off his shoulder, to the side. She understood the drop of his brow and darkness of his gaze. She wrung her fingers together and kneeled next to him.

The hole wasn't deep. But it was deep enough. She reached across Jon and took the bundle into her self one more time.

He was watching her. She knew it. She knew because the heat of it was making the tears boil against her cheek.

Dany placed it in the grave.

She sat back. She couldn't cover it. She stared, but she couldn't do it.

“There's probably some wild crop around here,” He murmured from beside her. Dany sucked in a breath and searched for his eyes with the disbelief of her own. But she couldn’t. His were lowered, despite his head being turned. They set somewhere upon her collarbone. It seemed like he couldn’t look at her. “I bet you can go find something. I'll do this.”

It sounded like an idea that made sense. They would be saving time by doing these things at the same time. They really shouldn't have stayed this long in one place, anyway.

But Dany found herself shaking her head.

Jon turned back to the hole. She leaned forward and took a bunched corner of the tarp, and placed it over as much of the cat as she could. She pushed one handful of dirt on top of it, and then rested her fingertips over the scatter of it.

“I'm sorry if you didn't want it like this,” Dany found herself saying. Jon was silent. He knew, somehow, that the words were not meant for him.

Her hand was shaking when she attempted another handful. It was the abrasion of doing something that she's wanted to do for so long, she supposed. That was when Jon took over and she let him.

They stood up. Dany looked out. He was right. There was some sort of flowers a hundred paces out. Dany stepped around the grave and into the grass.

_ Swish, swish, swish. _

Jon followed behind her.

He stood by as she picked some. They were simple, white, and small. But she thought it matched well. With the fur.

The silence was comforting and necessary. something that was becoming a common theme between the two of them.

_ Swish, swish, swish. _

Even though she tracked back, as she placed the flower on top, it was...pleasant. The warmth of the sun despite the air’s bite. The small beauty of the flowers in the brush of the grass with the wind.

She never thought a funeral could be this...lovely. At the same time of it being this simple. It was why she was crying, maybe. Something besides a grave was being filled. Something that had been empty for a few years too long.

Jon stood next to her. His hands were stuffed in his pockets. The sun was setting below his head. The dying light gave them a special kind of intimacy that Dany couldn't exactly comprehend - a sort of...relativity. A silent accordance of equal minds and hearts.

She could see it in the way his eyes and chin dropped. The persistence he had, to get her away from it. The weight of giving something its final resting place.

And yet, he was placing it all on himself.

_ Their mother didn't like my mother, nor when she had to look after me when she died. _

He must’ve been in the same position as her. So how could he handle it so much better? How did he know he was strong enough?

Dany wanted to do a lot of things. But it didn't mean she was strong enough to. No matter how much stronger they would make her by being completed.

She stepped into him, threading her hands through the spaces between both his elbows and torso created by his hands in his pockets. Her own clasped behind his back and she pulled her cheek to his shoulder.

He stood still at first. But slowly, his hands came from his pockets. They wrapped completely around her back and closed around the opposite sides of her rib cage.

His head lower to rest on hers. She squeezed her eyes shut, tears being pushed out, and hugged him tighter.

“Thank you,” she muffled against his shoulder. Jon nodded shakily.

They slowly melted into each other under the setting sun. Any warmth that she lost from her lack of a jacket was overtaken by...this. Whatever it was.

_ “Mama said she wants to be ash. To be released off of a cliff.” _

_ “Dragons don't burn. She will have a traditional funeral like the rest of this family.” _

It was good to be listened to. To be read with what would matter to her. And then not only respecting her, but acting really upon it.

_ Trust _, she dawned on. Trust, and...adherence.

The kittens mewed from the trunk where they had placed them. Jon pulled away, taking the weight of his head on hers with him that she started to miss too quickly.

Dany took her head off of his shoulder. Even in the dark denim she could see the stain from her tears. She awkwardly attempted to wipe it off his shoulder, and then pulled away quickly after realizing how pathetic it may have looked.

Jon squeezed her elbow before walking over to them.

They both watched the kittens crawl over each other. It wasn't hard to admit that they were cute. There was a black one that had streaks of brown, another one gray and brown and orange, and the last being a close color to its mother, but still had a darker orange tone.

“They are going to need food. They are just barely young enough to be without their mom.” She crouched down and held a finger out. The black one came up and nudged it. 

Jon crouched next to her.

“We won't be able to make it if we leave now. But we'll go tomorrow, first thing.”

“What will we do right now?”

Jon rose eyebrows in thought, running a hand through his hair.

“We can keep going, or stay here for the night. I'm fine with either. But I also have to do some map work.”

She felt bad because she could see how tired he was. But the thought of sleeping where they had just buried the mother… unsettled her.

“Just a bit further down.”

He nodded. They stood up together, and Dany took the kittens.

They rounded the car to both doors. Dany passed them into one arm to open it - Jon watched her struggle over the roof.

“You want them to join us? On this... Well, whatever this is?”

It gave her a thrill to know Jon was in this as blindly as she was. The feeling left her stumbling for an answer. The agreeance to such uncertainty.

“They need someone to care for them. Why not?”

Jon smiled and shook his head, swinging into the car. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: Daenerys attends her mother's funeral and is ignored by family members when it comes to grieving. Jon and Dany also find a litter of kittens with their deceased mother, whom they bury.
> 
> AH! guys, thank you for all of the love i have received so far on this fic. the comments, hits, bookmarks, tags, kudos....its wonderful. really inspires me to just pour out each chapter faster and faster and just get SO excited to continue. 
> 
> apologies for the shortish chapter - but we hit 20k words! i honestly have no idea how many words this will be. but well find out eventually!
> 
> come talk to me over at [gylbertblithe](https://gylbertblithe.tumblr.com/) on tumblr! AND:
> 
> Reminder that this story will be renamed "Wonderland" as per the next update!


	6. disc VI, track X, part II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daenerys fails to find comfortability in a new lifestyle. Jon, Dany and friends sleep in a not-so-insulated-car on a not-so-warm-night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fic title has officially been changed from drapetomania----> wonderland!
> 
> enjoy your read:)

All she would have to do would be to take the blanket off. It was hot, and blankets made her warmer. That was just how that worked.

Everything was hot, though. Her window was open, but the sir was hot. Her skin was hot, the hallway. The party down stairs, the hot breath out of every man’s mouth, the drinks even though they were supposed to be cold. The lap of Khal, and yet, his hand on her elbows were hotter. Pulling her against him. Away from her own space. Against his hot, sticky, bare chest.

The games she watched everyone play seemed hot. The drinks seemed to burn down everyone’s throats, and not one forehead was not beaded in sweat.

And so there was not one reason with she should have had a blanket on. Not even a sheet - a _ blanket _ was over her, melting her into the mattress beneath her.

_ Dragons don’t burn _, Papa said.

But oh, how she wished she would. 

It had been two weeks. She should have been used to it. 

The routine of events, in order; stare at the ceiling, go to a party, go to bed, go to sleep. Wake up.

Daenerys _ knew _ the routine. Perhaps was the only one who recognized it as one. But she still had yet to find a part she enjoyed. Which she probably ought to have found quickly, or she might as well just...fade away. 

It annoyed her, that not even the day time appeased her. What was so bad about staring at the ceiling, lost in thought? The answer was just one layer deeper; it was where she layed. What the ceiling had seen the night before. Daenerys asking the ceiling if it would tell anyone what it had seen, and when it didn’t respond, her turning numb with stupidity.

And then she would get up after a few hours. She would put on a dress. She would walk down stairs and sit on her husband’s lap, showcase his prize to the audience who cared. She never understood how his leg did not complain, nor did his arm and then go back upstairs when deemed to do so. Take the dress off. Lie in bed, and hope a bottle would smash over his head as she suffocated in the heat. 

That way, he wouldn’t come upstairs. Hold her elbows pinned beside her head until he got sick of her. And then pull her into him, a cage of hot bars until morning.

(Viserys only had metal cups, though.)

* * *

Jon looked over at Dany and smiled. Even in the short ride to the next shoulder, she had become enthralled with their new quest. 

The kittens had since found soporific in the comfort of Dany's jacket. He had yet to take a great look at them - all he knew was that there were three, and they are all blended together in a little nest of the warmth they had found in her lap. 

Dany, on the other hand, not so much. He couldn't tell if she was just trying to hide it, or she frankly just did not know she was shivering. Her jacket was preoccupied. 

It was a bit worrisome, either way. It wasn't that late and the temperature was already dropping. If they were not careful they might as well wind up in the same exact position of the cat they just buried.

He would really want to get a hotel room. Dany wouldn't like it - but when it came to freezing in a stranger’s car, maybe she would be more lenient with him spending more money.

Besides that fact, they would never make it. Not like any hostels would be closed - but he physically could not stare at the damned road much longer without falling asleep.

Jon reached over the console, to the jacket that was crumpled at Dany's feet. 

“With in the hopes you aren't trying to prove something, put this on. You're shaking.”

Jon tossed it at her shoulder. Dany caught it by one hand, and after feeling the denim, she obliged. It was two sizes too big, sleeves hanging well past her hands. She made the most of it twisting her fingers into the extra fabric at the end of the sleeve. 

Jon bit his cheek and pulled his attention straight ahead - the whole act was adorable, he couldn't deny it. She suddenly looked snuggled and made the rough denim look even more worn and soft.

Just as he could swear he would swerve them all the road with another second-too-long blink, a small clearing came into view at the side of the road. As he pulled in, Jon realized it was perfect for their...situation. The shoulder was deep enough to fully pull in to and the grass was long, surrounding it, which would act as a nice curtain. No one would know they were there. And for two people who just stole a car and were supposedly it on the run, that was a good thing. 

He put the car in park, immediately bring his hands to his eyes to try to wipe some of the heaviness away. 

“Sorry.”

He turned to Dany who was looking at him apologetically.

“What? For - why?” his voice was deeper, gruff in his throat. He just needed sleep.

“You've just been doing this all day. You're probably exhausted. We should have just stayed back there.”

Jon shook his head, shifting his torso in his seat. 

“No, that was a good call. And we're both tired, don't feel bad.” His head dropped to the headrest. “You okay with sleeping here?”

Dany stretched her legs out and then herself moved further into the seat. The kittens were less than disturbed by her adjustment.

”Mhm,” Dany popped. She snuggled more into the jacket, crossed her arms over her stomach, and closed her eyes with an exhale. Jon watched her and the kittens. They twisted their little bodies over each other, worming deeper into the fabric with their tiny paws. Jon lolled his head away from the sight, smiling.

He took the key out of the ignition and put it into his pocket. He contemplated moving to the backseat, for spacing reasons or in case Dany was just too shy to ask if she could lay across the bench. But she didn’t seem to mind his presence in the front. he twisted until his back rested against the window. His feet were able to stretch fully, too.

The sun was making its last bow below the horizon as he slowed his blinks to sleep, admiring Dany's peaceful profile and peaceful coaxes the kittens.

* * *

It was an indescribable amount of time that they were asleep, but the sudden awareness of cold was anything but.

Jon jerked awake, his consequenced exhale clouding in front of him.

“Shit.”

Jon swung his feet off of the seat and went to shake Dany awake. Even with the smallest touch to her bicep, she sprouted, eyes immediately searching the moonlit darkness. They landed to the hand on her arm, and then to his eyes. 

She let out her own clouded breath as recognition formed through her face. Jon found himself soothing his thumb up and down where his hand was placed when he absorbed the previous state of her paranoia.

“Hey, it's uh -” he cleared his throat. “It's too cold for…” 

Dany immediately checked on the kittens. Thankfully, it seemed like the folded layers of her jacket had protected them.

“I think we should - I think we should just... Just go closer.”

“Closer?” 

Jon cleared his throat again.

“Yeah. Uh - to stay warm. Just for tonight. We can get blankets and stuff tomorrow.”

Her eyes broke off from his. They danced between his collar bones.

“Why...why can't we just turn the car on?” 

Jon shook his head. “The exhaust isn't healthy. And it'll be overheated by morning, which means we will have to walk again. But I don't know how long it would be, this time. Definitely more than yesterday.” 

Dany starred, face blank and eyes slightly wide like he was at this point used to. In all honesty, Jon was becoming a bit confused. It seemed that she was getting... Worked up. Over something as small as nothing close to one another. She had broken into a store and stole a car mere hours ago, but there was something about this that for some reason struck a chord that left her responseless.

It was clear that she had trust issues - and with that reminder of it, guilt crept it. It wasn't like he was asking her to _ sleep _ with him... well, in a way... not resting. All the ways she had come out of her shell in the past few days seems to be swallowed back up right there at his suggestion. For them to live through the night.

“Dany, it's not really an offer.”

She adjusted some fabric over in the kittens. A shiver overtook her, and Jon rubbed his hand up and down her arm a few times. She didn't seem to mind it. In fact, she looked lost in thought.

Just as he was going to say something, she responded.

“I know,” her voice came small. He could feel the tension in her shoulders pressing down. “I'm just not good with close proximity.”

His torso warmed with the memory of her own was flushed against his hours before. He dropped his head and looked at her through his eyelashes.

“...Just be…”

“I get it,” Jon finished. He knew what it was like to not want to completely say something out loud. Especially something as self reflecting.

She kept her gaze down as she nodded and appreciation. Jon sat back and waited for Dany to initiate. Dany braced either hands on each side of herself. She inhaled and exhaled once each. She squeezed her eyes once, and then Jon watched them dance over the cats. 

She turned to him.

“Wha- where can they go? And be safe?” He gave her a small smile, admiring how much she already cared for these little creatures. 

Jon looked around and realized she was right to be curious. There was really nothing anywhere any less warmer than either of their laps would be. But if the leather seats were covered... plus her jacket too, maybe it would be alright.

He Shrugged off his jacket, and following it, his first shirt layer. 

“Jon, what are you -”

The sudden chill called against his bare shoulders erupted as he threw his jacket back on. Sure, he was now only in a thin tank and denim jacket, but buttoning it up all the way up would be...fine. There wasn't any other choice, anyway.

Jon took his discarded shirt. He fashioned it into something nest like to spread on the seat behind him.

He turned back to a surprised Dany, who watched his quick movements that were puppeted by his body’s soul need for heat. Jon went to scoop up the kittens, stopping midway as he noticed how close they were to -

Dany snapped out of a trance, giving a half laugh as she passed them off to him. 

“Thank you.”

Jon situated them, hurrying a little more as he heard the slightest chatter of her teeth. He turned back, expecting to wait a tiny bit longer or even remind Dany of the reason for this, and encourage her to move closer to him. But instead, he was met with her already moved in, trying to settle herself right up against him.

He carefully swung his arm around her shoulders, quickly keeping her slight resistance in mind. Her feet came onto the seat so her knees could tuck into her chest. Between her thighs and torso were her hands, tucked into her own body’s heat.

Jon didn’t know where her boundaries would start, or how far was her breaking point. She was already tense as his hand closed around her opposite bicep. He faced towards her, situating his legs to wrap in front of her feet without making it seem too enclosed. The crown of her head coincidentally rested upon the bottom curve of his one shoulder. The simple feeling of another body seemed to help with the cold; But it didn’t mean it was comfortable, or maybe even helping.

She was still shaking. He did another pass of his hand down her arm, but he knew it wasn’t going to help.

“I’m sorry. I’m - I’m trying -”

“It’s alright. You’re doing good.” he gave her a small squeeze. His eyes glanced down to her face. She had since shut her eyes, but harshly. Her body was hard with tension against him. “Relax just a bit. You’ll get warmer quicker.”

She didn’t exactly do that, but she did adjust herself.

The sound of her breath against his hard denim hit his ears. She had turned her head, temple now resting instead of her forehead, towards him instead of away like it was when she hugged him. The breathing came deep. Meditated. After recognizing the technique, the sound of sucking in through the nose and exhaling out of pursed lips, he looked back down at her. She had forced her eyelids to soften.

Slowly, Jon turned more towards her. He took his other arm and crossed it over her, hooking his fingers to suspend from her elbow. 

It wasn’t exactly a bad idea. But she did still freeze again. The breathing stopped. It was replaced by a brief dip of her head as she gulped. 

His back hand rubbed down her arm again. It went back up, too, over her shoulder and circling her one open shoulder blade. Coaxing.

“Breathe.”

She did, the air skipping in. But it came out smooth. 

He relaxed his hand as she breathed again. His fingertips grazed in lines.

“Good. You’re doing good.” he wanted to apologize for her having to do this. Especially when it looked like she was nowhere near ready to do it yet. But his voice was encouraging enough, clear enough, for her to know without him having to speak it. Besides, they had apologized to each other enough.

“Can...can you just not touch my elbow? I’m sorry, just - not...not that spot.” her words came out tight. But Jon nodded, chin tickled by her hair. He moved his outside hand to her wrist.

Dany didn't move - almost like she was thinking whether or not that was alright. Her hand shifted in hesitation, and then came out of its alcove to take his own wrist into it. She took it off hers, and instead, on top her outside knee.

Her hand lingered there for a second before retreating. Jon looked at where his hand was now placed, and then Dany. She furrowed closer into him. Jon bit his cheek in pride and rested it on top of her head. He could feel his throat tighten as his own eyes squeezed shut.

“Okay,” Dany whispered under her breath. “Okay.”

Jon nodded.

* * *

They woke to the sound of their syncopated breathing.

Warmth had been thrown over his legs, and it had been the first thing he noticed. Some time throughout the night Dany had slung her legs over his. Her hands were fisted at both sides of his breast pockets. There was still a clear underlying tension, but it seemed like she had gotten more comfortable.

As comfortable as able. All the joints in him screamed at the stiffness of long term placement He groaned softly, straightening his knees across the seat behind Dany. He looked out the windshield. Morning sun was paling the sky in its new light.

Dany’s throat cleared softly as she shifted. He looked down at her as she blinked awake. 

“Ah,” she winced a bit, pulling her head slightly away from him. Her hand came to the back of her neck as she tilted the crinks out. 

“Yeah, not the most comfortable position.” he had no idea what time it was - just that their sleep was definitely not completely full filling. But he didn’t feel like he was going to collapse, so that was alright at least.

Dany nodded, taking note of her grip on his jacket. She released and roamed her eyes. Shyly, she started to unfold off of him and re-latch onto the cuffs of her sleeves. Jon turned behind him and picked up the kittens, placing them into her lap.

“Oh!” All of them have since woken up, finally. They stretched their small limbs and let out some half-meows. “They need to eat.”

“So do we,” Jon reminded her. She looked at him and smiled a bit. He put the keys in the ignition, but paused when his hand went for the gear. “Dany.”

She took her focus up to him. “Yeah?”

“Last night -” _ this morning, whatever. _ “Thank you for trusting me.”

She fidgeted. It was clear that she wasn’t completely okay with it, and was still kind of on edge, channeling her shakes into checking the cats. He may not have known her long, but frankly they’ve spent a lot of time together. Enough to know when something was off, atleast. Especially with someone...well, it seemed like she had been holding her true emotions and reactions in for a long time. In a place she could finally let herself slip, he could hardly blame the sort of vulnerability. Unless she had always shown that, and he was just someone who wasn’t blind to see it. Either way was good in terms of understanding, though.

“I don’t know how I can’t at this point.” Dany went against her mind’s want, and looked at him. “But i only can because you let me. So i thank you for being patient.”

They saat in each others gazes. “We have to stop thanking each other for everything.”

“Yeah, it _ is _ getting repetitive.” they both laughed. Dany bit her lip, running a hand down the black kitten’s back. “How about we come up with something new?”

“New?”

“Yeah, another phrase. Instead of ‘thank you.’” 

Jon nodded, eyebrows furrowed in thought. “I can’t think of anything.”

“Me neither. Give me some time, I’ll come up with it.”

“I need some time, too.” He pulled out the maps and a pen. “Figure out where we are going. C’mon, lets stretch our legs as the car warms.”

* * *

Dany stared across the morning sun slowly trickling over each grass peak. Her chin was cushioned by her hands that placed on the car’s roof. To the side, the kittens were placed, where they took unnecessary advantage to stretch their legs, too.

Jon was at the front. He was using the hood of the car as a table, the pen making a light scratching sound as he made lines and notes. The CD had gotten old by now and that new sound was a taste of new, sporadic music. 

The reminder of new left her uneasy. She had to admit, and she could without denying with circumstantial evidence - she was not thinking about a new way of saying thank you. The thought left her mind when fresh, field air hit her nose, filtered her thoughts into things she only wanted to think about. Or, actually, didn’t.

Which, quickly, she realized she did not want to think about last night. Not the feeling returning at the mention of it, nor the thought of being pressed up to another’s body. But above all of that, the truly terrifying parts. Like how sharing heat was different, and somehow more intimate, than sitting in the heat of the...aftermaths. That the repetition of Jon’s name in her head somehow steered her away from another panic attack. How _ somehow _, even though the position she was in should have felt restricting and like a cage, she found herself getting freaked out only because she was telling herself she should be.

There was still a long way to go. She still flinched at the touch of hands at the wrong inches of her skin, the wrong shifts or looks at her. But there was a step - last night had been a step, over a giant ledge with a tightrope that was barely a string. And it only frayed a little. 

But it was also sad. Because suddenly, she felt such joy - such..._ pride _ after all this guilt. In herself, her belief in her stupidity. In leaving. Which still had that dirt that needed to be wiped away. Nevertheless, this step went against all of that guilt. It was making all of this worth it.

But who could she share it with?

Dany turned her chin Jon. He was bent over, concentrated. The pen flicked back and forth in thought. After a quick observation, she saw how he was left handed. Yet another thing she had, and could not share with anyone.

A singular thing was already enough.

Dany walked over to him, quickly sorting out her thoughts. At her presence, he straightened. Dany found a specific spot on his shoulder to stare at instead of his eyes.

“I, uh -” she wet her lips. “I just feel like you deserve to know what last night was about.” he faced her fully and let her speak. “It’s just...a partner I had. A few years ago.” two. One and eight months, actually. But it felt longer. “He’s gone now. But when he wasn’t, there were...there were reasons I wanted him to be.”

He looked at her. In a way he knew she could feel, and yet, it only intensified. 

The more of her story he learned from her, the less he really understood. First an overprotective brother, but then, an abusive partner. Enough to traumatize her for years. And yet her brother hadn’t done anything to stop it? Or know what was going on quick enough to save her.

Forgetting his questions, he reached for her elbow. But then, memory clicking, his hand landed on her shoulder blade instead.

He watched her close her eyes to his touch. Not uncomfortably - at least he didn't think - but she didn’t make any move to stop it. “You did good. You listened to what i was saying needed to get done. Thank you for that.”

She immediately scrunched her face up at him. 

“- ah, shit. You haven’t thought of another name yet?”

“Still working on it.”

“Well, I’m almost done. Look here.” They turned to the maps. He pointed at where they were, which he identifying from the satellite tower they had passed a minute before parking for the night. They had a small expanse left before a small town, which would lead to a big one eventually.

“And that, right there…” he leaned closer, pinpointing an X he made. Dany leaned closer, too, looking on in anticipation. “That’s our destination.”

She looked closer, and he watched her eyes slide over. They were wide, but this time with curiosity. And excitement. “The beach?” she asked. He chuckled. 

“Yes, the beach. A rather pretty one, too.”

“Pretty?” they sat up and Jon folded it up. “Does it have a name?”

“Not until i tell you it does.” she looked at him confused. “It's a cool name. And it has a reason. I want to see if you can guess.”

“Now?”

“No, when we get there. Speaking of, grab those little urchins. Time for some breakfast for us all.”

Dany bit her lip smiling, bubbling over to the kittens. They were on top of Jon's door, so she simply entered the car from his side and slid down the seat. Jon followed her and toyed with the gear. 

“For a second,I thought you were going to be driving us.”

“Ah, that would be a sight.” she situated the cats, waiting for his response. She looked at him when the silence dragged out. 

“Would you want to learn?”

“What?” she followed his knowing looks. She raised her eyebrows. “T-to drive?”

“Yeah, why not. It’s a straight line, there’s nothing to lose.”

“Except the car, our lives. The cats’ lives.” 

He rolled his eyes. “I don’t know what roads you’ve been on, but it is not that hard.”

She already knew her answer - she knew they were just bantering. But still, she looked between him and the wheel. And then nodded. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (edited 2/5)  
im participating in Jonerys Valentine's week (held by iceandfiresource on tumblr), so unfortunately we wont be updating for about another week! but dont worry, because we'll have a bunch of AU's cooked up for the wait;) i loving torturing myself, so were doing all 14 prompts! miss you guys!


	7. to the life behind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daenerys has a reading lesson. Dany and Jon head into town.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *lets out a wattpad breath i didnt know i was holding* god im FINALLY back. thank you so so much for your patience!! Valentines Week took alot more out of me than i expected, and I really just feel behind and my fingers got tired. i have ALOT of WIP's going, but im determined to update this fic atleast bi-weekly, since ugh, i just love it so.
> 
> were about to get into the goods. im excited. the chapter count is definitely going to raise, dont worry. we arent done yet.
> 
> also, i would just like to note: this story isnt exactly taking place in present day. when i first started writing it, i was thinking 90's, but i was a kid in the 2000's and know NOTHING about writing in that period as i quickly learned. This doesnt really have a set year, but kinda just think 90's level-technology.

  
“Read it again, Daenerys.”

Daenerys looked at her father from across the table. 

She never liked the table that was in his study. She didn't like his study room, either. It never seemed like it got any light, no matter how many lamps they put in. Nor did that condescending echo ever go away either. 

Daenerys looked at the huge book in front of her once more. She loved to read. When she called her into his study for a reading lesson, she was excited. The last one she had was with Mama. And that was before New Years. Before everything changed.

But quickly, Daenerys learned that she did not like this type of reading.

“Studies show that things passed down through generations are given more profit when put for sale.”

“Flip to page two-eighty-seven.”

She did, and immediately started;

“The stock market’s trust de...desree...desreeah…” She paused as Papa let out a huge sigh.

Daenerys tucked her shoulders into themselves as he stood from his perch and walked over to her, flipping the book to a new page. His big finger pointed to a paragraph.

“Read that.”

“Ana...analeetics -”

The words disappeared from her sight as he flipped the page again.

He pointed his finger to another paragraph. She attempted to read it again, but at the first stumble over words, Papa turned the page. 

Daenerys assumed she should have maybe started to feel frustrated. Papa had told her the best productivity came from anger, which came from frustration. Maybe he was trying to invoke it. But to do what, she didn't understand. If anything, she tried to focus on the words more; she was stumbling over them because she simply didn’t know how to read them yet. But that was okay; her favorite part of reading was figuring the new words out.

But Papa turned the page before she was ever able to. 

She tried to sound them out in her head. Maybe that was why. Maybe he didn't like the sound of her trying to mold her mouth to the new pronunciations. But no - He turned the page again. At one point, instead of turning the page, he covered the passage with his hand, leaning on it. Daenerys caught his firm look.

“Do you understand?”

After a small hesitation, Daenerys shook her head. Mama told her to never lie to Papa - he would always find out.

Papa turned back to the front of the book. He pointed to a paragraph. 

Daenerys started reading it; quickly realizing it was the one she had read time and time again earlier and their lessons. 

She recited, clearly with familiarity. 

“Do you understand?”

“... Practice?”

“No. Familiarity. A good business move is to keep where you are comfortable, Daenerys. Never jump into things. All that comes with it is confusion, uncertainty, and unpreparedness. And what does that mean?”

She was quiet.

“Failure. Nothing but failure, Daenerys. And failure can turn a man mad.  _ Never _ jump into things.”

With that, he left the room. He never left her alone in his study.

Daenerys looked back at the page, actually reading the passage now.

_ Studies show that things passed down through generations are given more profit when put for sale. Especially the uncommon items, or hand made. _

“Keep these, Dany,” Mama had told her. They will come in use more than you know one day.”

Dany admired the rings and token, all cold in her hand. “For when I get married?”

Her mama smiled at her, but it looked like she was still sad. “It will come to you in your dreams.”

* * *

The plan was not working out as expected.

Dany sat in Jon’s seat, hands on the wheel. The kittens sat on the far end in the passenger side. Jon was in between. His one arm was thrown over the back of Dany’s bench and the other lazily grabbed the bottom of the wheel.

“Alright, it's really not that -'' his opening was yet again cut off by a meow. He attempted to continue only to be interrupted again.

Jon shot the kittens a glare over his shoulder. The gray one shot him a meow in return.

Dany snickered.

Jon whipped back towards her, face struck with betrayal. She swallowed a smile.

“Ahem. as you were saying.”

Jon sighed.

“Yes, as I was -” Another meow. He dropped his head. “Gods.”

“I don't see why you are getting so distracted.”

“Yeah, yeah.” he felt something on his lap. The gray one had ventured out of the group and on to it. “Tell you what. We go get these ones fed first, then you get your first lesson.”

She reached across him and grabbed the light colored one. When Dany held it in front of her face, it released a loud meow.

“Alright. Rain check.”

“Rain check.”

They traded places and Jon easily set the car into gear, speeding off into the road.

Not overheating the car last night was a good idea. It wasn’t far by driving, but still about ten minutes. They would’ve been exhausted and the kittens would have eaten them alive. Not to mention the hill that would’ve left their calves screaming.

Soon they were brought into an exponentially-not-barren town. A few houses before the town centre. Its short main road had nothing but a gas station, department store, small diner, and some odd pawn shop from the looks of it. 

There was a small clock tower amongst it all, which read close to eight AM. Good to know. 

Jon pulled over to the side of the road, a little away from the department store. Dany grabbed her beanie and pulled it over her head - in the safe seclusion of the field, she had abandoned it - and fastened a middle button of the denim jacket.

He rounded to the sidewalk and waited for Dany to exit the car. She was taking longer than necessary, and so he peaked in, only to find her trying to keep the kittens still against her chest. Her jacket covered them, but there was no mistake of the lumpiness. Jon opened the door.

“Dany, no, you can't  _ bring them in _ -”

“Where else will I put them? We can't just leave them in the car.”

Jon wanted to mention how they had already survived multiple nights in a car by themselves, and how a few more minutes wouldn’t matter… but she seemed determined. And to be fair...it was pretty cute. It looked good on her.

He watched her try to wrap them for a few more seconds before stepping in.

“Okay, fine. Come here, I'll help.” She looked at him, and he gestured out of the car for emphasis. Dany climbed out, cradling the churning bundle.

Jon moved them accordingly, throwing the fabric over them in certain ways, and then took it from her. One meowed again - he didn't know which one, but,

“Shush.”

He nodded his chin at the flaps of her denim jacket. Dany gave him a questioning look, lifting a side up with equal feeling.

Jon flipped the wrapped kittens so the opening was facing her, and then placed it on her chest, slightly tucking it under the denim too.

It looked inconspicuous enough. just...like... well, like she was holding something. Like a baby. Or something. Not kittens, or any animal maybe or hopefully, and that's what mattered.

Dany assessed his work, and then nodded, rubbing a hand up and down it once. 

“Okay, thank you.” He smiled as her face scrunched up again. “I forgot to think of something else to say instead of that.”

They started walking towards the entrance, Dany tagging in close to him.

“It's alright. We have time.” 

A person passed them, and Dany pulled her hat down further and stepped close to his side. He hoped they had time, at least.

Surprisingly, the kittens seemed to understand the slight stake of their situation. They had meowed once on the way in, but stayed quiet after Dany’s small, soothing shush.

She and Jon now stared among the cat food options, confused.

“You’d think with a town so small, their options would be somewhat limited,” Jon sighed. Dany read a certain label again.

“This one says its softer and easy to eat, for cats with teeth problems. That would work, right? Because they are kittens?”

“Well, that brings me back to the one  _ for kittens _ , Dany.”

“Yes, but we don’t know how old they are. What if it's for kittens older than them and they can’t chew it? Or too young, and they won’t get enough of the nutrition they need?”

“This is why I'm a dog person. They eat anything, they don’t care.”

“Exactly. I’m surprised you are wearing shoes.”

She bounced them up and down a bit as one started to get antsy. “I know, we're almost done.”

“No we aren't. We’re nowhere  _ near _ done - “

“Hello, would you like my help with anything?”

They turned to find a woman standing a bit aways from them, wearing an apron that was clearly a work uniform. Jon looked upon her before realizing Dany had gotten quiet.

He looked over to her, finding her eyes immediately casted to the floor. He stepped in front of her, letting her find some of her space behind him. 

“We, uh -” he cleared his throat. “We just rescued some kittens and don't know their age, but need to get them food.”

“Ah, quite a few new additions to the household recently, huh?” she stepped in front of Jon, searching the shelves. He cleared his throat again. 

“Uh - what?”

The woman looked over her shoulder, a gleeful confused countenance as she passed her gaze between Jon and Dany. Her eyes landed on Dany’s chest, and Jon followed. 

“Congratulations. What's its name?”

His neck burned as he turned to Dany. Her eyes had become wide again, biting the inside of her cheek as they slowly understood what the woman was insinuating. 

“O-oh. I, uh -”

“Rhaella,” Dany said, lightly scratching her nails along the fabric. She averted her eyes from Jon and gave the woman a quick smile. 

Jon let out a hot breath through his nose, hoping his face wasn’t too red. His hand closed around Danys opposite shoulder, hoping the situation wasn’t too awkward for her. Surprisingly, she leaned into him.

The woman turned around, holding a box designated to kittens. 

“See, I told you.” Dany shook her head.

“You’re married?”

Before he could even think of the question, the invasive undertone of it, Dany’s hat tickled him as she nodded. 

“Oh my. Newly weds, it looks like, then. We don’t get visitors here, nevermind honeymooners. Quite an event! Fun engagement story?”

His heart burned with irritation. This town didn’t have much to talk about either, it seemed. 

“No,” Jon butted in. “We just...decided to.”

“Hm. That’s a way to do it. But it means you both got to decide the rings, so that's nice.”

This woman was going to ask to see them, and he knew it. The thing was...they definitely didn’t have them. Nor a marriage. Nor a baby.  _ How did they get here? _

“Do you want to see them?” 

Jon turned, surprised, to Dany, who was pulling her hand out of her pocket. The woman’s face was lighting up. It quickly died at the sight, though.

Jon turned to see the supposed disappointment. There on Dany’s fingers were two clunky rings; all highschool-class-ring of sorts. One held a gem, and the other was a collection of inscrutable swirls to understand at the view he was getting.

“Vintage,” The woman commented simply. 

“They were my mother’s.” 

She gave a customer-service smile and handed the box of food to Jon. “That food will be good for them. Congrats again.”

Then she disappeared into the next aisle. 

Jon raised his eyebrows, exhaling, and stepped in front of Dany. He took her hand up to his face to see the rings.

“Where’d you get these?” with them closer, he could see the old silver with smelted into a sort of reptilian shape. 

“As I said, they are my mother’s. I’ve had them.”

He took a minute to look at them.

“Rhaella?”

He felt her eyes on him and met them as she nodded. 

“You are a good listener.”

“You're a good actress.” Jon caught a hint of a smile, but before a mew from her bundle chased it away. He chuckled, shaking his head. “Come on, let's go get all of this stuff paid for.”

On the way to the register they grabbed two blankets from the emergency section. The cashier was a different one from the woman they talked to before; this one paid no mind to the items they bought, nor Dany's attempt at soothing increasingly restless kittens to no end.

Jon felt her eyes on his fingers as he counted out the exact change in coins and bills. The cash he had was running out fast; it wasn't like he brought a whole lot with him, expecting...well, any of this. And considering Dany had a reward set out for her... His family tracking him down through credit card purchases or withdrawals was not going to be the way to go.

Nor was falling down to less than thirty dollars left, but.

They had what they needed for now. They just had to be careful with food purchases. These kittens couldn't get through this whole box of food easily, either. And yes, he would like them to find a hotel, especially try to make it for the one up the road. But Dany seemed alright in the car at night. At least they had blankets, now. Last night, the way he knew he had to push her for such circumstances, it frankly made Jon sick when he thought about it too hard.

It was clear she was running from some sort of physical abuse, which irrevocably made him break apart inside. Because... Well, seeing how much she cared about some random cats, how much he could see her feel the sadness and pain of finding that mother cat dead in the trunk... such a gentle soul that not only went through the pain as much as she seems to have, but came out of it as she did, too.

He had seen some shit. People at their lowest, most vulnerable points. Those who seemed that their story could not get any worse, and that their future is so uncertain that it felt like a sin to hope. Even when there was the potential, the strings, all just one step two little.

But no one had carried it as Dany.

Dany followed Jon out of the shop quickly, the tiny pressure of paws against her chest almost as bruising as the sight of Jon's empty wallet on the front of her mind. The rooms, the gas, the water… it all suddenly added up.

They made their way back to the car, dumping the store bag into the back seat. Dany followed in so the kittens could roam.

Jon circled around and entered on the opposite side. 

The three little ones had erupted into loud, whiny meows as Dany unpackaged the cans from the box. She giggled as they climbed into her lap, causing Dany to have to hold the food up high as she opened it. Jon raised his brows with how quick they circled around as she placed the food, and gods, were they even chewing it?

“They better not get any of that crap on the seats.”

Dany scoffed. 

“Please. It’s not like we stole this car in the first place. It's not even ours.”

They both looked at each other, rather seriously, but soon cracked a grin, laughing their backs into the seats.

“I can't believe we did that,” she explains with disbelief. Jon shrunk.

“ _ I _ did,” Jon reminded her. “The amount of times brothers and sisters have called me up because their car had been stolen during their mall trips is enough to ease my guilt, frankly.”

“Really? It's that common?” The small tidbit of Jon's life had started to relieve Dany more than what could be imagined.

Jon gave her a silly look. “I would think you would know even more than me.

Dany rolled her eyes. It should have been a heavy subject for him to bring up. What, with her stealing his car to escape from another impending, unwanted marriage arranged by her brother who had already sent out to hunt her down... But it didn't feel like it. It felt impossibly light. And fun. And... Brave? Adventurous?

“It's not like I didn't know how to turn the car on or anything. 

“Yes. About that.” He leaned towards her with interest. “Want to get ourselves some breakfast and then a first lesson?”

Dany bit into her growing smile.

There was that diner beneath the clocktower. Once the kittens were resituated into the makeshift rucksack, all quiet with their full bellies, They started heading past all of the odd arrays of businesses that all seemed like nothing but ancient family stores that caught luck in the economy.

When Jon was younger, his family would pass through this town on the way to the main one. Much like what he was doing with Dany now. He knew this town existed, that it was just a stop that was abandoned by city planners. But in a little kid's mind, especially one on the way to the beach, only halfway remembered it as the check point of  _ we’re nearly there _ . 

The grocery store, Diner, a sorta playground... And a pawn shop. One that Dany had her eyes especially trained on.

Her steps had slowed and her fingers danced in her pockets. Jon, who fell ahead without noticing her decreased pace, turned around to scan over her odd body language.

“See something you like?” Not like he had any sort of money for it. But he wanted to know what was up.

“Not exactly,” she responded. “But I…”

She directed her eyes at the ground, thinking. Jon took the liberty of the minute to walk closer to her. Her hand pulled out of her pocket. In the palm of it was the two rings from before. 

Already, he was going to refuse. It seemed like she had fond memories with those. At least to take them with her in the act of running away from...well, everything, with nothing. But his voice dies once he noticed something else there among them. A medallion of a sort, engraved with what it looked like a crest. And  _ loaded _ with red jewels.

“Wh - what the -”

“It's a family heirloom.”

“And you're going to  _ sell _ it?!” his energy had risen in his voice, the idea ringing alarms of disbelief. But Dany kept hers low, diverting eye contact.

“I was planning to, anyway.”

He remembered their conversation from before. How she told him about her mother’s rings, and how she very easily could have brought up the  _ other _ thing. That very easily, as it looked, could have solved many problems. Including stealing a car, even. Something that, as much as they were joking about, could have and still  _ could _ end very badly.

“And you haven’t thought to mention it.”

Her cheeks pinked. “Nothing really went according to plan.”

He pulled her to the corner of the store, away from eyes that wanted to pry. “But this is the new one. This -  _ I - _ am your new plan. From what I took from before, you didn’t have much of one in the first place.”

That seemed to strike a nerve. Even more than before; her face flushed, and her lips pinched down. But still he grabbed her shoulders, forcing  _ some  _ sort of connection since her eyes were still elsewhere. “Dany. We’re a team now. Teams help each other and share important things. Including -  _ especially _ plans for money. Especially in a situation like ours.”

“You’ve been kind, Jon. The most understanding person I've had in a long time.” He would take the sentiment much more to heart if her tone wasn’t more stern than he’d ever heard it be. “But not many can know what these mean to me. Nor the idea of having to sell them.”

She wasn’t looking for him to feel bad. It was as he said before - they were a team. And teams told each other important things. Her eyes were looking at him now through determined brows.

“They’re all I have, really. But along with the meaning of them is the reason why they were given to me. It's been nearly fourteen years, and it still took me until last week for me to completely understand what that was.” She gulped and lowered her gaze to her hand. “Just because you plan to do something doesn’t mean you’re ready to do it.”

Jon licked his lips and nodded, even if she wouldn't see it. With a sigh, his hand came to the back of her head, opened fully on her beanie, and pulled her into him.

Her free instinctively wrapped around his torso, the balled fist hard at the base of his spine, and she gave herself a long exhale against his chest. The kittens in the blanket at her chest were a barrier that separated the heat...the pressure of their bodies he strained for at the memory of when they first found them. But the feeling of her tenseless being, the point that he initiated and she accepted, even right now, it made for something. He didn’t know what to name it. Atleast without sounding weird or cheesy. But it was something important. And so he gave her one long squeeze because they were a team, and teams told each other things that were important. Even if they didn't have words to describe it. 

“I’m sorry,” she murmured. “You’ve done too much for me to hide something like that.”

“We tell each other the full truth for now on. It's the only way we can figure this out.”

_ This _ . whatever it was. They were running to nowhere. Sure, the beach was their first stop, but what was next? Forever? 

_ Tell each other the whole truth _ .

Thing was, he believed Dany was thinking the same thing. Or at least knew it. So he didn’t have to say anything.

They parted ways; Jon to the diner to order take-out, and Dany into the pawn shop. She had pocketed the rings and left out her father’s pin to sell. 

Her rings were the comfort. The pin was the profit. She always knew that, really; especially in the way that out of the three things, the medallion always found its way into the corner of her pockets and not her fingers when seeking for the anchors of them.

The idea wasn't that daunting when she first thought it up. All the stories she would read, all the ways all of those travelers would trade valuables and trinkets for coins or food, they all painted the idea in her head that she could do the same, and just as easily as a street trade. But walking into the shop...the door bell that rang pulled her into present day. Into a room full of trinkets that looked just as interesting as her own. 

The grooves of the three dragon heads imprinted the pads of her fingers as Dany walked up to the front counter behind it was a man, every but as bulky and intimidating as someone might imagine along with the word, and he was in a chair that seemed like it had been there for ages. 

“See somethin’ you like?” he guttered, repeating the words Jon had asked her not so long ago. He was now somewhere else. She realized right then that it was her first time truly on her own in the open world in...well. Ever, pretty much.

“Have something you may like, actually.” she slid the medallion across the glass surface. The man sat up, hovering his focus down his nose.

“And why’s that.”

Here came the story. She pulled it from far back in her memories, to the time on her mother’s bed, thin, sickly fingers braiding her hair as she explained why these metals were so paramount. ( _ “They aren’t jeweler for dress up time, my child.”) _

“There is only one other like it. A part of the main royal family heirlooms.”

“Don't try that with me. Like shop here is for all the lazy blokes who would rather sell ol’ granny’s plates than flip some burgers. That ain’t special, nor believable.”

An ache started in front of her brain. She grabbed a magnifyer she spotted. “If the story isnt, atleast look at the material. That's Valyrian steel, with dragon glass crystals.”

It wasn’t a lie. He still gave her an uncertain look, though, before giving in. 

“Hm,” the man simply said. “Hm. Mhm. Hm-m.” 

Her fingers tapped.

“And where’d you find such a thing?”

That old picture of her on the Missing poster flashed through Dany’s mind. 

“Some garage sale.”

“Likely. Most of the families are gone by now. Stuffs’ scattered.”

She wondered if her family was seen as gone. They - well, Dany and Viserys at least - weren't dead, and they still had their house, but it was all inherited. 

Dany had stopped learning about the other families after her mother wasn’t there to teach her. The descendants were of no familiarity. Including their fate.

The Targaryens, until Viserys, kept up with their reputation, though. Even after the ruling of royal families fell through. They built business off of it. Dany simply understood it by growing up around it. She wouldn’t be surprised if others did, too, but...it seemed they did not.

“It's - um.” she cleared her throat. “I  _ heard _ that it was a traditional wedding gift from man to wife. If the woman was not of their blood.”

“All stories.”

“That i researched.” In a way. “It’s fine if you don’t believe them. But you cant deny that metal and stone is faux.”

He flipped the medallion in his fingers, tilting it towards the single lamp light. 

“‘S a pretty thing, I can tell you that.”

“It is.” it was the one thing she found from her father’s belongings as such. Others looked daunting, or dangerous, even. The reminder left her heart twinging - she was  _ selling  _ it. She didn’t know how to go about that. The fact that she was selling a part of her past to escape it. 

But by the look in that pawn brooker’s eyes, it seemed like it served its purpose.

Her pockets felt different as she left the shop. The medallion was heavy, heavier than the cash she was just handed, but something about how she got the money seemed to weigh more.

Jon was walking diagonally through the street. He made it to the car the same time she did; wordlessly, they climbed into it, settling the kittens somewhere on the floor in the backseat to not get fur in their food. 

“You did it?” Jon asked, pausing his food-unwrapping. Dany nodded, pulling out the wad of bills, watching his eyebrows raise at the sight. “Wow. you’re set, it seems.”

Dany watched his return to getting the food out - she ignored her stomach’s rumbling at the delicious scent radiating, instead, running over his words, cutting short on the context. “No, Jon -”

He looked up at her, fingers still busy. She placed a hand over them for the silence. 

“Jon,  _ we _ are set. This money isn’t just for me.”

He took a moment. “No, Dany, that’s -”

“What were you saying before, then? About us, and being a team?”

“I didn’t mean I was going to spend your money.”

“ _ Our _ money. We have to share important things. And just as much this... _ trip _ we are doing is mine, it's yours, too. Ours. And if it isn't, I’ll walk right back inside and make the trade again.”

Jon stared at the money she held between them. He ran a hand down his face, resting it underneath and looking up at her. “We’re really in this. No turning back, in this.”

“If it’s alright with you.”

He gave a curious tilt of his head. “Only if I'm not the only one drivin’ it.”

Dany gave the steering wheel an equally curious glance. “Deal.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> despite the long absence, this was a pretty filler chapter, so im sorry about that. i promise everything will get spicy soon. 
> 
> in the mean time, check out my profile for the several stories i wrote for Valentines week! it was so so so much fun, and i got to connect with so many readers and writers in the fandom. its time to start working on my remix work, too! def excited.
> 
> (also, did i just sneak in the fake dating trope? fake married? does it count?)

**Author's Note:**

> id love to hear your thoughts in the comments, or talk to me @ gylbertblithe on tumblr!


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